jen78nc

Ive talked to him about it quite a few times and told him that it bothers me that he talks to her, but he continues to do it anyway.. thanks everyone for your posts

Hi all. Well I am new to this board. I am glad to have found it! Well, heres the story. My husband has a close girl friend that he talks to who lives in texas. He has known her for about 8 years, a little longer than he has known me. Anyway ever since we've been married they have talked quite a bit, and a few years ago they were talking through email and it turned out they wanted to be a little more than friends. He was telling her that he loved her. She was probably saying the same thing back. Anyway, that was back in 98-99, but I guess I havent really gotten over it and they still talk now. He knows Id prefer that they didnt talk anymore but he does anyway. He thinks im being silly for thinking that anything is going on. .She is married with a child, as are we. I just dont like their close relationship. They talk every few days, sometimes a few days in a row, and once in awhile a few times in one day. They also send pictures back and forth sometimes. Every time they talk on the phone I get all annoyed with him. It just frustrates me that they talk so much. Also, she is from the same city that I am from, and he keeps telling me how we should go visit my mom , because she always comes up here to visit. I guess I always just think he has an ulterior motive when he says that. Anyway I dont mind if they just talk sometimes, but yesterday she called and they talked about half an hour, and then she called again later, and they just talked for a minute. She said she had to get back to whatever she was doing.. Then why did she even call in the first place?? Anyway, I heard some of their conversation from earlier in the day. She was asking him for his work address to send pictures to, supposedly of her daughter and her this halloween.. Anyway my husband was saying "well Ill be waiting for them" and "i like the pictures that you send." I suppose thats not so awful, just a little annoying. We are planning a trip down to texas, where shes from, actually my hometown, and he was asking if she thought her husband would mind them hanging out.. He was talking to her about when her husband left him a nasty voicemail awhile back because of all the calls that she was making to him. Anyway, my husband says that they worked it out, but still seems to think her husband might get upset.. Gee, I wonder why? lol Anyway, there wasnt too much else to the conversation.. Seems like they will talk about any small thing, just to talk. They were talking about different kinds of foods they like and dislike, etc..I just think their relationship is weird. Now, I have found out that they are emailing each other again. My husband is telling her things like he dreams about her, though he didnt say what the dreams were about, that her emails brighten his day, and also he tells her that he hopes to see her again sometime soon. Then just recently, I read an email he sent her saying "sometimes I will just lay in bed thinking about you, you are a truly wonderful friend." Now this really upset me and I know this is not just a friendly relationship. I just dont know what to do about it. It doesnt sound good. He has already lied and told me he didnt even have her new email address and doesnt talk to her through email. So he has lied quite a bit in our relationship. I feel like I can never really trust him again. Anyway, I saw someone post about a book called "Not just a friend." I actually just ordered this book. Has anyone here read it? Well, I am open to any advice. Sorry this post is so long.. Thanks all! P.S. He calls her "my friend" and doesnt call her by her name.. Is that weird or is it me?