Laylainlove

Thank you for all the advice it does put things into perspective. I have autism and sometimes don't know whats a normal way to act. I've never lived with someone before and when he suggested it I didn't see the issue because I thought it would be easier to see each other with me being in nursing school and him working so much. He also wants so make it easier for me to go to school and not have to worry so much about bills.

This is abuse and unsafe behavior. You need to go no contact with this person and move on. She has destroyed your confidence. She abused you yet you are still considering her feelings. This is a dangerous person and if you allow this to continue to happen it will only escalate. It doesn't seem like you're getting anything positive from this relationship and it's not your responsibility to fix this person. Focus on yourself and the things that make you happy and you will attract someone who suits your needs better.

This is completely unacceptable behavior and needs to stop. The ex has not let him go and he hasn't let her and her family go. A break up doesn't have to be a complete cut off but there is way too many interactions between these two and the fact that you don't know when half of it is happening is a red flag. You are his new wife and it feels like you are being pushed aside and gaslighted. You may trust him but I don't trust her. If she needs things done in her apartment she needs to find a way that doesn't involve your husband because she is no longer his responsibility, you are. She is exerting a level of control over him that would make any woman uncomfortable. A part of me feels like even if they haven't been intimate this has already emotionally gone too far. You are sharing your husband. You need to set boundaries and if he continues to cross them you need to be prepared to follow through with consequences. I would also recommend therapy to some extent to figure out how to improve your self worth and figure out why you are okay with letting this happen. You are a kind person and show empathy towards his exes situation but it has gone too far.

I (32F) have finally found the one I want to marry (38M). We've been dating for about 6 months and have started making plans to move in together. I was at his house taking a shower when I noticed a little white pill on the floor. Curiosity got the best of me (he's a healthy firefighter and EMS worker so seeing a random pill on the floor was completely uncharacteristic) so I looked what the pill was on google and found out it was a form of viagra. I couldn't help but be devastated. My initial thought was why hadn't he mentioned this before then my mind went to me not being enough for him. I don't like secrets and it made something that was potentially innocent and relatively normal for men seem like something more. He explained to me that it was something his friends talk about using and he just wanted to try it and see what happened but I just don't like the fact he was on medication without telling me. Should I feel this way? Can someone say something that will reassure me about this situation? Do alot of men his age take medication like this or could he possibly be stress?