antoniov

Last week things started to calm down and I started to to discuss this all with her and she told me she wanted to get help and counseling and that we would take it from there. She went out drinking this last Saturday and disappeared for the night. I was going to get gas and cigarettes Sunday morning and saw her walking down the street with the guy that she had the affair with. Common sense would say to let it go but there must be some sort of animal instinct in men that says otherwise so I proceeded to spin my car around and I was attempting to jump out of the car and since there were maybe only 20 yards from his house they took off running inside and locked the door on me. I proceeded to go over to the door and yell all sorts of profanity's. I was so mad because just this last week she told me she wanted counseling and was going to stop seeing this guy. We agreed last week that we would make a decision about divorce after the counseling and I feel like she just threw it all out the door. Yesterday night she tried to kick me out of the house but I told her I couldn't just leave with nothing as I have so many of my possessions in the house and I really had no where to go. I told her that wasn't fair to toss me out after everything she has done to me and the whole time I am the one working and paying all of the bills. my worst fear is that I will leave with no where to go and then still pay the rent for her and her no good trailer trash boyfriend who doesn't even work will lay up in my place on my dime. That just doesn't seem right and I the "animal" instinct in a man tells him to fight to defend his territory. It is weird but look at what animals like lions do. They fight each other to the death to defend their territory and woman. I think that is why things are so diffucult for us humans in the 21st century since we are programmed for this behavior as well but our civilization uses law to try to supercede our animal nature. I will send another update shortly.

If you see my post on top, you will see my wife had another man's baby and was/is having an affair with him. This could be a possibility for any man who is having an affair with a married woman or vice versa for that matter. All I have to say is that think of the consequences of that and you will see it is not worth sleeping with someone who is married. Tony

Thanks for all the replys. I really do appreciate hearing everyone's opinions. I have been reluctant to dicuss this in depth with my family as I don't want them to start treating the baby any different based on this. I think I definetly will explore some counseling as an option although it does seem that what I have to do is pretty clear cut. i.e. 1) Move out 2) Hire a lawyer 3) Get a paternity test 4) File for divorce She obviously was not raped last year since it is not fathomable that someone would be raped and the search the person out and start a relationship. As some others have described on this board a woman's reaction would quite be the opposite. Saying she was raped was an easy excuse for her to illicit my sympathy and to cover the fact she slept around on me. If she would have came to me last year and said I cheated on you and think I am pregnant with another man's baby and told me the truth she knew I would have left on the spot. I will keep everyone here posted as to what happens. Tony

I would like to get opinions on this situation as it is driving me crazy. In June of 2004 my wife went out with a friend and her friend showed up around 2:00 AM in the morning saying that she was unaware of where my wife was. She said she disappeared in a bar. My wife showed up about noon the next day and said she was partying with some girls she met. I was a little upset but let it pass as it was right around her birthday. In July, 2004 my wife announced she was pregnant and I was very excited. I had no reason to expect anything strange was happening. In December of 2004 my wife called my while I was on the way home from work and said she had something extremly important to tell me but that she had to write it down it was so important. I got home and she handed me a three page letter that proceeded to explain to me the baby she was pregnant with was not mine and that all she remembers from the night in June when she was out until noon was wakeing to a strange man having sex with her in a condo she did not recognize. She said she got out of the situation and found out she was pregnant but was afraid to tell me about it and that she feared calling the police for a number of reasons. I guess it is not uncommon for a woman who is raped to keep the incident a secret. She assumed she was drugged and raped as she said she had no recollection of what happened to her. After reading the letter I assured her I still loved her and encourged her to go to counseling and assured her I would love the baby as my own. We both made an agreement that I would not tell anyone and the baby would be raised without knowledge of this. The baby was born in Feb and I took 2 weeks off work to help my wife take care of the baby (we also have a 2 year old son). That went well and I went back to work March 1. About the second week of March my wife announced she was going to the bar while I watched to kids to unwind and have a few drinks. I didn't think this was a bad idea as she did go through a tramutic birth and thought it would be a good idea for her to see some friends and have a few drinks. She never returned home until the next day at noon again. She told me that she ran into some old friends and was catching up with them, etc. Over the course of March and April she did disappear at night a couple of more times and always had a very angry attitude towards me, constantly belittling me for no reason and when I expressed concern to her about her odd behavior she would always have some elaborate excuse that seemed believable since up until this point (we have been married for 4 years) she has been the sweatest and most trustworty person. Last week, my wife and I were visting her best friend and her husband at their house. Her best friend grabbed me aside when she had a chance and told me that the guy who had raped my wife last year regularly comes over to my house and has sex with my wife ever since the beginning of March. I was completely blown away by this and had no idea what to think. I asked my wife about it and she said that her friend was jealous of our marriage and coming up with ridiculous stories to break us up. I agreed with my wife as the story her friend told me was impossible to believe. So after we got home, I decided to surf the internet on my wife's computer. I normally don't use her computer but mine was broken and in the shop for repairs so I sat down at hers. She got really mad at me and started yelling at me to get off her computer and wait until mine was fixed. This was completely out of character for her so I knew there had to be something bad on her computer, but I had no idea what it was. Well, I waited for her to go to the store the next day and went on her computer and preceded to find many love letters and pictures of her with a strange man. When she came home I confronted her with this and she said it was the man from a year ago and that they were now in love. she said she hired an investigator to find him so she could confront him about the rape and when she confronted him she found they had so much in common that they decided to start a relationship. I am completely blown away by this. It seems totally illogical on her part. My wife told me last week when I confronted her that she would stop seeing him and just today I saw his number on the redial. (She purposel dialed a bogus number after talking to him thinking the phone's redial feature only kept the last number called but I discovered that your can redial up to the last 5 numbers dialed) I also found out she sent a picture from the digital camera to him last night as well. I asked her why she would talk to him after she promised last week she wouldn't and she said he called her on behalf of his mom to see if she wanted to play bingo with her and that she is just being civil since he is the father of the baby. Did I marry a serial liar? This all sounds insane!! It is driving me insane. It would make me feel better to read any comments if anyone who read this story is kind enought to share with me. Crazy in Wisconsin, Tony PS. One other quick question. If she was got pregnant (or at least did the deed on Jun 10, 2004), is it possible for the baby to be born at full weight Feb. 15, 2005? She claims conception starts 2 weeks before sex is had as that is when the egg dropps and that the baby was born only 2 week early. If you count from June 10, 2004 to Feb 15, 2005 that is only about 8 months if you count the 9 month pregnancy starting around the day of conception. Can anyone clarify this for me? Maybe the whole rape story is BS and there is more going on than I even know. We were in New Orleans in May of 2004 and I wonder if she could have gotten pregnant some how there?)