krustykrab001

Thanks for the help so far guys! We had a pretty good chat last night and I think it'll be okay for the moment. However, that leads me to my next question - how should I go about saying that all the crap has to stop, basically? I mean, it's a very easy thing in theory, but actually saying it to her - she has (and I can see how) sort of taken it as an insult, ie. her taking it as me just telling her to somehow stop her depression, or "get over it", which simply isn't possible with clinical depression (as you may or may not know, it's a mental problem, there's nothing to "get over"... the depression isn't caused by anything, so it's extremely hard to get past it as it's just *there*).

Okay, backstory: I'm 19. Met this awesome girl almost 8 months ago. We hit it off perfectly. Admittedly we did rush into going out (within a few days), however we seemed to click - our personalities are very similar and we share the same opinion on many subjects. Over the past 8 months I've grown to really love her and care about her, and I'll readily say that I would do just about anything for her. I realize how cliched that all is, but it's not even something to be questioned, for me. We've talked very deeply about moving in together, marrying eventually and so on, and it's always just seemed like the right thing to do. Now, that all sounds well and good, but here's the problem - she has serious depression and anxiety problems (I'd rather not go into detail, but very serious). Due to this she often overreacts and/or is overemotional with things. This overemotion often comes out in the form of anger. Basically, this has led to us having quite a rough relationship. Rough, in that we've fought at least once every 1-2 weeks for the past 8 months. These fights often stem from something very small, and due to her depression, lead to her saying some very hurtful things (think along the lines of "I hate you, I wish I'd never met you, you just guilt-trip me into being with you, we're broken up, **** off"). Thing is, I've always tried to take her problems into account and thus give her a lot of leeway with these things - I realize even day-to-day life can be extremely hard for her and she's only human, emotions aren't an easy thing to control (I'll be the first to admit that - I'm not great at it either). Anyway, although compared to other relationships these fights and such things that are said might seem extremely serious, they've (sadly) sort of become the norm for us. Our fights rarely last more than a few hours, let alone days, and we always come back to each other. We both always apologise, and when we aren't fighting, can say without apprehension that we love each other dearly. I realize how dumb everyone must think I am, that I keep going back just to get severely hurt every time. Thing is, the majority of the time we ARE happy - and when we are, it's just amazing. If it wasn't for these silly fights (most of which stem from nothing and are just a result of her clinical depression and my own overemotion) we would be, well, perfect together. Because of such awesome times, it's just so hard to not go back. I know that I keep getting hurt, but I still love her to death and I still cling to the hope that we can be happy together - and I know that we can be, because it's been shown time and time again. Anyway, we had a huge fight last night (at her house). Again, it stemmed from basically nothing, and led to some extremely hurtful things being said from both sides (her to me: "I hate you, I hope you die, I'm never forgiving you for this"... me to her: "you're a selfish b**ch, just **** off"). I slept on the lounge, and I guess was able to swallow my pride and tell her in the morning before I left that I loved her and that I was sorry for what happened (which was the truth, despite how much some of the things she had said had hurt me... I cried for hours). Earlier tonight, over the net, she happily told me (despite what I said to her in the morning) that she wishes she'd never met me and that was the end of it. I hope (and am somewhat sure) that she still loves me and in her heart wants to be with me. The number of times we've "broken up" and then gotten back together in the past exemplifies it.. she just goes too far with what she says, but usually doesn't mean it. I do still love her so much, and I know it's stupid for me to keep going back (and I'm not gonna run back to her begging for her to take me back, don't get me wrong) and getting hurt, but all the same I know we can be happy together. What should I do? Thanks in advance.