Damsel in Distress

Thanks h_b_k_02 I know, I know. But when I broke down on Monday I didn't even know about my sis. She told me Tuesday, when she came to comfort me about having to leave work early on MOnday. I don't know what's masking what any more. I feel so confused and lonely, it's just dreadful. I'm trying so hard not to call my ex. Thank you so much for your support, I do so appreciate it. I have made plans for tomorrow night, and for the weekend, but tonight is hard. It's my sis and my ex-ex's second date.I know where they are and I@m also fighting the urge to go and have it out with them - but I know that on many levels it's none of my business. It might just be that that's what's meant to be and I have to accept it. How, I don't know. Thanks again. I'm so glad I found this site.

Thank you for responses, but I've lost my momentum for keeping going. I also got news yesterday that is not helping. My sister told me that she and my previous ex - who I went out with before this one - and the ending of which caused me to go into what was initially a rebound relationship that deepend - are on the brink of starting a romance. He and I had managed to develop a friendship over the 18 months I was seeing the one who has just dumped me, although it was difficult whilst I was seeing someone new. By Christmas he was telling me he loved me and that he'd never felt so close to any woman before. I resisted his charms, for the sake of the man I was with, only to be dumped anyway. As soon as I was dumped my ex-ex ran a mile and started seeing someone new. Apparently that ended and he is now wooing my sister. She and I have a close relationship and had been very supportive during these past two months of heartache. Now with this happening I feel I'm losing two of the closest friends - my ex-ex and my sister. Everything is being blown apart. I'm also worried for my sister because I'm afraid he will hurt her as he hurt me. But I am feeling so hurt myself that I am paralysed. Good god, I feel so unloved and unlovable. I'm usually sensible and bright and don't suffer fools but I'm finding it so hard to understand what's going on in my life right now...

My ex dumped me at the beginning of February. We have had no contact since and I am a mess. We were very close, it was a mid-distance relationship and spent 2-3 days together every week. On days we weren't together there were 1-2 daily phonecalls, usually from him, and several texts. He tried to end it a week before Christmas. WE had a whole night of crying and talking it over, eventually I said if that's what he wanted that he should just go. He did but came back two hours later, full of remorse, saying he didn't want to break up and was so so sorry. We got back together but Christmas and New Year were spent apart. Six weeks after that first break up, he ended it again, this time badly. We were doing our normal phone and text things, although he had started saying horrid things to me. Then he suddenly didn't contact me for over 24 hrs, waited for me to call to see if he was ok, only to be told he wanted to 'call it a day'. When I asked why, he said 'It's the call of the wild'. He had been to a party without me the night before in his home town, and I can only assume he got off with someone else. I can't stop crying and I feel sick. It's been two months now. I see my friends, I joined the gym, I've managed to keep going to work, but on Monday I broke down at my desk and had to go home - I haven't been back to work since. I've been very strict about not calling him but I'm worried I'm going mad because I miss him so, even though I'm angry, and I don't know what I did wrong. He had a lot of baggage and issues, but so did I and I thought we were working them out together, supporting and loving each other. Help! I don't want to get depressed or start taking anti-depressants but I am losingmotivation to look after myself... Help!