sarsapolis6

got it

hey, I wasn't that serious when I mentioned fried chicken!

I was reading another person's post about dinner at his place, and I have the same situation, almost. I've been dating a girl for over 3 weeks now and I really want to have sex with her. But I'd like to think of some ways to get to that point. She's coming over to my dorm room and I'll supply the fried chicken, the movies, and anything else that she might like. However, some of my buddies have joked about "playing Twister with her" and even though I won't do that it makes me wonder what type of activity we could do together (that isn't passive like a movie) which might get her into the mood. And unfortunately it will be inside because the weather's bad. I could sit with her on the coach and give her compliments till I'm blue in the face..but that's not what I want to do, and that's too ordinary. Would love to hear some ideas on seduction activities. Thanks

lol

Spin th' bottle? lol

So where does this leave me?

I'm still in my twenties, still young and I look forward to going to school full-time so that I can literally start my social life over. From ground zero. One thing I learned from community college is that 95% of the time you won't make life-long friends like you would in highschool or staying as a resident at a 4 year college.

In the meantime I can only feel helpless when I see that a former classmate's Myspace page is crammed with positive comments from long-time friends and associates..such as "happy holidays" or "that performance was really cool last Thursday!" Those people are living their lives along with an extended family of friends who still stay in touch with them constantly.

One goal of mine is to try to stay in touch with people..harder than it seems though. But for potential friends or associates it's important that I do it. Ultimately I look forward to the day when I finally by accident meet up with someone from highschool who used to have all these misconceptions about me, (thanks to my lack of socializing) and hopefully some cool will come out of it. I'm sure that will bring me peace.

I have always been a quiet person, unfortunately that's my flaw. In elementary school I wasn't the one who was genuinely curious to know about the other kids in my class, or interested in starting a game of four-square with some kids that I wanted to know. And I was always in denial about my loneliness, which is why the thought about going to a social counselor or a psychiatrist never entered my young, stupid mind. My parents wanted me to go, (especially since I had temper tantrums for no reason) but I never followed up.

My loner attitude in childhood was prevalent in any type of social environment my parents introduced me to (because they hoped that somehow I would make strong friends with other kids). Middle school was worse because I was ignored by many kids, AND got into fights. I was a nerd, and treated like one. This continued into highschool.

Except that in highschool, everyone was more mature about my "nerdish quiet personality". People ignored me because they were more interested in their own cliques or people who they liked from other cliques. Yet, they were nice. In fact, my social environment in highschool was hospitable and I didn't even know it! I don't know how but back then I wasn't aware that keeping to myself would be detrimental to my four year experience in highschool. The others knew.. every guy and girl who wasn't in a relationship was either on the football team or in some "signature" group (the drama crew, the AP classes clique, the backpack hip hoppers, e.t.c.)

I also wasn't aware that there were people who WERE JUST LIKE ME. I could've made some friends in the engineering club..who actually did alot of fun things together that had nothing to do with building robots and transistors.

I'm quite sure that if I had showed a little interest in other people, become more adventurous, talked a little more, then maybe I would've ended up with a few good friends from highschool. But, I have none.

And, they're all doing well. Most of them have careers in music, (the popular, more sociable career) while I am furthest away from what they're doing (construction) and to make matters worst I will be leaving my city to move somewhere else (so that I can finish my education, get a good career and then move back home in X amount of years).

Anyways, I saw that myspace had a page for my highschool alumni, and I decided to browse through it. The result: I now feel regretful that I didn't take advantage of the golden opportunity back then in highschool to make friends and social networks for the future. Has anyone felt this way?

Hi, I am a little confused on the way we conversate. When I mean by "we" I am referring to college aged people since that is the major demographic of people who live in my neighborhood and on campus. Just recently I am starting to become a more sociable person, however a small part of me feels lost on what people usually talk about and what people are MOST INTERESTED IN when we talk about our experiences. For example, if I talked to my roommate about my experiences at an Saturday night music show that I went to and I met up with people who we both knew, what would be more interesting to the roommate? The event itself or what "I, Joe, James, and Harry said" at the event?

Also, do you believe that the majority of us in metropolitan societies (from ages 18-30) are interested in talking solely about the "new, unique, un-heard of before things" rather than something that is unfairly labeled as has-been? I often feel that I have to play catch-up sometimes when I finally buy a DVD of a recently popular movie, (a certain hip hop documentary, like Scratch) and then when I have to describe about how cool it was to watch that movie, I can almost tell that my audience isn't as interested.

HOWEVER..at my job training program there are guys in their late 20s and 30s who often bring up topics (mostly about entertainment) that were popular when they were younger. And they do it alot, from wrestling to pop stars. They don't care if something is has-been, they just talk about it.

To summarize, my major goal is to stay on the same conversational wavelength as the people whom I will get to know, because I want to make a common connection with those people. That's why I try to read blogs, look at the online news magazines, read The Onion, watch "some" TV, and so on. Because of as yet I don't have alot of friends who keep me current with things: "Hey man, check out this new handheld game system! My brother works at this store and they just pre-released it, dude!"

Have a great week

n TO the more seductive, male-to-female style of conversation? I know that touch involves everything, which evolves from a hand on her back to hands touching each other to and then sitting really close to each other with legs accidently bumping into the other.. but I need to work on my seductive language. In the past I did that by using compliments, something nice about her here..and then mentioning another nice compliment there. But then after that I kept wanting to say "let's have sex" or "would you like to go to my place" or "you've got kissable lips".

However I never said those words because I felt that it would be an awkward segue. A conversation topic about dancing..then, suddenly the conversation turns into compliments which leads to seductive talk.

Is there something I'm missing? Humor, for example? Or, maybe I should talk about topics that are someway related to sex, but not dead on about sex.

I'm so concerned because I have gone on the fourth date with a girl and she looks and acts like she wants to go ahead, however I feel that I need to say the "magic words".

BTW, the woman I am going to be with is a BBW, and this will be my first so I don't know how different the sex will be.

I've made it to the point where a girl is interested in having sex with me. I'd really love to impress her with my oral skills, but I don't know how to start. The last time I did oral it wasn't fun for me (not because of the plastic wrap) because I kept licking and licking and she showed no reaction. Also, I was in an uncomfortable position and it felt like I was licking wet skin. I read in an online guide that licking a woman's vaginal hair "mutes" the taste..which now explains why I didn't taste anything.

So, I would like to know how a man can enjoy giving a woman her pleasure. Should I start with the fingers or my tongue first? How will I know if she's enjoying it? And, what's the best position for giving a woman oral that's comfortable for the man and woman? Are fingers too rough for a woman?

sensuous, sexual mood? Are there pre-foreplay games that I could "play" with her that somehow steers her into a sexual state-of-mind? This is for a woman that I'm planning to go on 3rd base with

Thanks

Hi

On my way to Monday night class, before getting in the elevator I had let a girl walk through first, and she said thanks. Then I was walking fast down the hallway because I wanted to get a good seat before the lecture started. Before entering she asked me if I was taking the same class as she was. I sat down, then she she sat down next to me!

Halfway through class, on break she asked a guy in front of her if he had the notes from last week. He did not. She was about to ask me the same question when I asked her if she had a copy of the syllabus. So we helped each other out.

Then she asked me if I had bought the book yet (so many questions!) and finally at the end of class she introduced herself to me. Now as for me, I was acting like a robot, talking in a near monotone voice because I was so tired and dull from the lecture. But now that I know this girl is somewhat interested in me, I have to really act like an "interested guy"!

Am I right? Plus now it makes me wonder in my head "what happens next?" I think in the near future once she gets more comfortable with me, we might talk about what we did over the weekend. but for now I will do..

well, nothing.

Yesterday a female classmate invited me to her dorm room and we watched a movie during the afternoon. We haven't gone out on a romantic date..in fact it is almost like I'm hanging out with one of my guy friends. Plain, platonic fun.

So during this movie, it had a short movie sex scene (nothing too wild, PG love-making) and I asked her in a humorous way "what are some of the misconceptions you've had about sex?" I didn't ask her bluntly "are you a virgin?" No, that would've been stupid and invasive.

So she answered my misconceptions question, and then I also shared some of my childhood tales.

After a short while she's got this kinda embarrassed smile on her face, blushing and she says "wait a minute..why are we talking about this?"

I didn't know if that was a sign or not but the next thing I said was "Well, OK we don't have to TALK about it." Then I gave her this knowing look.

Her reaction? She played it off! I was expecting to get slapped or something or "Please leave". But she just joked and we continued to watch the movie. I didn't do a thing.

Any suggestions on my next move? the bottom line is that I do want to eventually have sex with her, because we haven't verbally confirmed that we're "friends". All we're doing now is hanging out together after class. One time I played ping pong with her, then I showed her how to play arcade games at the Student Union. Not once have we gone to a restaurant or park.

how do most of you deal or interact with newcomers to the group or clique? Let's be honest, everyone!

Especially if the newcomer is from a different race or different part of town or hasn't grown up with you like your other friends have. What usually happens/doesn't happen?

What does the newcomer have to prove in most cases? How are some people ultra-successful at "fitting in" with a variety of groups, and remaining as a strong fixture in those social groups? Example: A guy who lives by himself, likes to enjoy things by himself but his personality (or something) allows people to actually invite him to social events, like a play or an outdoor music festival. Another person might not receive the same kind of generosity that he gets.

I had intercourse with a girl. It took me forever to get it up. Then, when I started on the intercourse, she was so tight that as soon as I went in I ejaculated. Not fun. (wearing a condom) Does lube work? What type should I use?

I think I got it. I'm only mentioning things that HER and I could possibly do TOGETHER. Eating out at exotic restaurants is one idea to mention.

come up with things to tell her. She asked me:

What type of things do you like to do?

Now when a girl asks that question, she wants to find out if there's anything that I could possibly have in common with her, right? Well it is the fear of "not having things in common with her" that has my brain doing overtime on memory searching. I think I've covered all the bases..

online activities

social activities

sports and rec

solo activities

thoughtful and self-improvement activities

But my reply letter is kinda long and in some cases I am describing some of the things that I like to do instead of doing the MySpace approach:

"Art * Music * Photography * Movies * Nuff said"

I just want to hope that by unleashing a barrage of activities I can actually "hit" her interest. I want to be careful not to mention things that I know I can't do (like surfing) however I don't want to be DULL. I could say that I like going to magazine release parties but realistically that's not "fun" unless you know the people there.

Day Weekend. If you were in the same situation, then I feel bad for you too. How come your associates or friends didn't invite you? What do you think was going on in their minds to decide "...I'm..not going to call him/her to the party, because I think.."

Why is it that most people don't care to develop a friendship with you? They'll be friendly with you, say whats up but never invite you to a cool event? Or they'll let you get a sneak preview of their own social world (like a chance encounter to an associate's friend's birthday party with 56 guests) but they won't help you form a strong connection with the people in that social world?

Never talk to each other again.

You don't want a back-and-forth situation of emotions between you and your ex-boyfriend. Once you cross the line of intimacy, it can be very hard to act like friends. He will feel jealous of you if he's your Best Friend and you become very intimate with another man. You will feel hurt as well if he meets a girl at school, they date, then they...well you know.

To witness a past love with another lover while I'm her friend is crushing on the soul and on the eyes. Yes, you want him/her to be happy..just not when you're around.

If it's over, then it should be over. Sorry, but there are millions of other males out there who can be your best friend..and others who can be potential mates for co-habitation, reproduction, and so on.

I was told to not talk about the weather. And I agree..its the lamest conversation topic in the Known Universe.

"I look forward to talking to you"

I said that to a girl on her phone message and now thinking about it, I believe that was a total waste of words. Another one that I need to get away from is

"I hope your summer has been great."

ku'yodo!!! Doesn't that sound so incredibly sappy?

How many of you hate leaving phone messages to your friends or friends that you need to reconnect with after a long period of time? Sometimes you just don't know what to say without it sounding corny or "putting too much on it", and I'd rather wait until I speak to a live person on the phone. Work is different..I have to leave a message for my employer or client.

irrellevent to your social group of friends and co-workers? And also what topics are completely unsafe in group conversation?

Irrellevent topics are ones that others are not interested in talking about. They'll give you an annoyed answer like "I don't know, man..look on the Internet." or "Uh-huh. Anyways, Rachel and Doris look hot, so I'm gonna ask them out..."

So basically you're not reaching the point where the other person(s) will talk passionately on and on about a particular subject.

And I am failing the test that women give me.

Sometimes I fail before I even start (dating)

What I fail in has nothing to do with money, status or looks. It's developing her interest in me, which can of course lead to friendships or network connections or romantic relationships.

Anyone know how to "pass" this test? Right now I have only one girl friend, and we usually don't talk much because she lives in another city. As for the women in my own city, I've tried but I can't seem to develop strong social connections with women that I could possibly date or go to events with. Maybe it's not a big big deal

But actually, I wasn't. I just walked in the clothing store and acted friendly, noticed that the baseball game was on and commented on our favorite teams.

No smiles, no conversation. Oh well. So yeah their customer service stunk but it made me think back to times when I went up to other groups of guys and I received the same "we-don't-trust-you-get-out-of-our-space" look. I'm thinking about going down to the basketball court to play today and I'll probably get the same thing.

So my question is: How common is this amongst guys? Is it natural for us to not warm up to people initially? How do we break that barrier of negativity? And why does this happen within our own races, but if it's a newcomer from another race, he gets treated with more respect?

I bet if I was the cousin or half-brother or family friend of one of the dudes in the store, I would be treated differently.

I try not to be cold towards strangers, (sometimes I just am) because I see other guys who greet strangers as if they've known them for a long time. In my neighborhood, that's just...

gay. Or stupid.

Maybe it is a natural thing.

And back to the store situation, maybe they were wary that I would steal something, but there are people who act friendly and have eyes like a hawk.

Anything else you wish to let your potential dates know about you?

When this question popped up earlier today, I had a very difficult time answering it, and it's still not completed. Lengthy application processes!!!! Aiieee!!

I may need some help in answering this question..either I'm too tired from school or I simply can't find anything from within myself. Another question that I'm stuck on is:

What do you like to talk about?

A good thing to know about me is:

What do you like most about yourself

The problem is simply not coming up with something to say..it is rather coming up with something INTERESTING AND INTICING and UNIQUE to say that will make ladies flock to my profile. It's the same thing tactic for resumes..an HR person will pass over hundreds of resumes that look the same, but will stop to take a look at the one that stands out, even if the applicant doesn't get the job. At least they got their foot in the door!

Thanks.

Over-the-top dramatics brought to you byyy:

Myself, a one man company who's gone confused for over 2 years about dating, and doing a darn good job at it since the break-up from Girlfriend! Our NASDAQ sticker is: LOOSR