kamelia
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Everything posted by kamelia
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Day 56 NC I still miss him sometimes and I´m wondering what he thinks of me? Has he ever loved me? Has he ever considered it serious between us? Does he miss me at all?
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Day 39 nc I feel like I´m already over my ex and even if he would call and wanted to go back, I wouldn´t want him. It´s just because I met another guy and he is everything my ex wasn´t. Really responsible and able to give me what my ex never did. I just realized how stupid I was to expect from my ex to be somebody he wasn´t. Yesterday I wrote him a long letter about all the advantages of our break up. Every sentence started with: "I´m happy that we broke up because..." Then I wrote down disadvantages of our break up and they were so few. I didn´t send it to him, but it was great to realize all this things I wasn´t happy about being with him and the way he treated me. Nobody should be sad about losing someone who didn´t want to be in their life. There are so many people out there who could be your dream partner and who want to meet you as much as you want to meet them...
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Kris, I understand your anger, it really is frustrating not to hear from your ex but remember that he will miss you too and if he won´t, he isn´t worth your love or your friendship. Try to go on a date with some other guy, it will make you feel better. That´s what I´m doing anyway, even though I don´t really care about the guy.
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day 34 NC Today was hard, I felt strong urges to reach out, I feel like he forgot about me. I´m reading different posts about break-ups and nc rule and it makes me stronger and it gives me hope that in future he might contact me when he is ready but it´s so hard anyway. I miss him so much and think about him all the time. I kind of regret that I unfriended him on facebook and now I can´t see his posts or anything about him but I also know that it´s better not to be friends on fb. Before I was always checking his last active time and I don´t think it was good. It´s so hard when I don´t have many friends here and my family is far away. I should probably go back home because I feel so lonely as I am in a different country. It´s like a roller coaster, in the morning I think how great it is now that we broke up as I can concentrate on my studies, I have so much free time, I feel more focused and organized. But in the evening, I really start to feel lonely, I´m going through every little situation in my head and feeling extremely guilty for how I behaved on certain occassions with my ex and wondering if that´s the reason why he didn´t want to be with me... I would give worlds to see him but I know I have to wait till he contacts me first and if he doesn´t I have to accept it and forget about him even though I can´t imagine that now. 30 day nc was easy compared to this, because now I just feel it´s forever. I set myself a goal of 60 days nc and after that I plan to do 90 days nc and after this time hopefully I won´t think about him as much as I do now.
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Day 29 I can´t believe I kept nc for so long... He made no attempt for any contact during this time I think about him quite often but I know that if he isn´t interested in contacting me there is no point. I honestly thought he would call me after a few weeks saying he made a mistake and wants to be with me. Well, I was wrong. I probably thought he loved me more than he actually did. But life goes on. Anyway, I´m chatting with another guy, who is sooo interested in meeting up with me... I´ll see how it goes. Wish me luck
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Day 21 Every time something bad happens in my life, I want to write to my ex soooo badly... I just remember all the times when he helped me out of a difficult situation by standing by my side and talking to me in a positive manner. I need him so much now and I can´t even talk to him now, it´s horrible. But I know if I reach out, it will be just worse. He would make me feel worse about myself and the situation because he would say something like we are not together, I´m not your boyfriend so I can´t help you, I want to be single and stuff like that. I feel so helpless now. There is a new guy I like but the relationship with him is not so strong so that I could tell him things like this. What should I do???
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Day 20 His friend texted me but I´m not going to reply. I wonder if he texted me because my ex told him it´s over between us or just out of curiosity. Feeling good today, looking forward to Christmas
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Day 19 I´m actually wondering, does no contact rule apply when I wasn´t in a "real relationship"? Today I started to realize all the things that weren´t right in my "relationship", like I knew about them but I didn´t realize how important they were. Like I couldn´t plan anything with him to the future, his friends were more important for him than me... So it was pretty bad. I just don´t understand why I can´t find somebody normal? Ah please help me...
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16 days is a great achievement, keep it up no contact is sooo much better than low contact. It is better for you to heal your heart and also to find out if she cares about you because if she really does, she will reach out. If she doesn´t feel bad about hurting you, you should really move on and find somebody who will genuinely care about you. Sorry to hear you can´t sleep well...
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Feeling a bit better now, but still checking his online status on fb, I don´t know why. I got a new book about relationships today and read a few pages, and realizing all the bad things I have done in the relationship, I was pining after him and this is the result. Anyway, maybe it´s good that we broke up, maybe he wasn´t the right man for me. I´m dating another guy and he is doing everything my ex was doing at the beginning and then what he stopped doing - inviting me out, texting me, calling... But I´m not attracted to him, I only want him to be my friend. I hope this period of 30 days will soon be over so that I can reconcile with the fact that my ex is not interested in meeting up with me and I can move on with my life.
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Day 13 I want him back so badly... I thought this will be easy but it´s not
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Day 11 Today I had a sudden urge to reach out. It was after one guy called me and he told me he was thinking about me all the time and that he wanted to move things forward between us but I only see him as a friend. After that call I had to install my messenger app again (because I uninstalled it so that I wouldn't be able to check my ex's online status on fb, I know I was supposed to unfriend him but I just can't do that yet). So anyway I had this urge to contact him and it was sooo strong but after seeing him online I calmed down. I know it sounds stupid but that's how I felt it. Kayley, I'm so happy that you didn't contact your ex either. I'm sure he misses you too but for you it's better to keep no contact so that you can get over him if he doesn't reach out...
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Day 10 of NC. I have had high ups and downs today. One minute feeling happy and not missing him at all and then feeling very sad and lonely. I don´t know why I have it like this. I always have to think about things I did wrong in the relationship and it´s torturing me. I´m always wondering what he feels, if he misses me and if he has already found somebody else. It´s so hard but I know that I wouldn´t be happy with him if we stayed as we were. Something had to change. I wish it was easier and if I knew what he´ll do after this one month of no contact, I could prepare myself for it and already start getting over him if he doesn´t care about me.
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I understand you completely, I had it the same. From the beginning I was the one who was distant and he was pursuing me. But then it changed because I wanted something more serious and he wanted the things to stay the same. Now I am very sorry that I appeared to him as a needy person, while I was just unhappy with the situation and wanted to move things forward. And I know it´s so hard to maintain no contact but believe me, you can heal your heart much more easily if you do. It´s not about him to come back (even though it might happen) but it´s also about you moving forward with your life. Believe me, forget about him. If it was so easy for him to forget about you, he isn´t worth your time. Maybe if you focus on maintaining nc for another month, it will give you a sort of a plan and after that you can decide if you really want to contact him or not. Also you could use this time to focus on making your life better, doing what you always wanted to do, start a new hobby... I hope this helps...
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Kayley, if you are still hurting about your ex, then it´s probably not a good idea to break no contact because you first need to heal your emotions. Maybe after some time, when you will get over him, you two could be friends, but it could take a year or two. One way to get over him could be that you realize that during the time you two were together, he wasn´t completely honest with you. You might have thought that he felt the same way you did but in reality he was just faking it because it felt good to be with someone who thought so highly of him. At least that´s what I´m guessing that happened. And also, the fact that you could have something good between you two is questionable because it takes two to tango and obviously he wasn´t as interested as he appeared to be. The reason you pushed in the end was maybe because he could not fake it anymore and you somehow felt it and you tried to save the relationship by putting more effort into it. So don´t blame yourself for it. I don´t think he thinks ill of you, you should be thinking ill of him! You deserve so much better, a guy who will be so happy to be with a wonderful girl like you and be honest with you all the time. And the only way to get such a man is to stop thinking about your ex. You should be so proud of yourself that you maintained no contact for over a month. The longer you maintain nc, the easier it will be for you to forget about him. Wish you luck!
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Day 4 NC I feel like I´m the only one writing in here Anyway, I hope somebody reads it I´m thinking about my ex all day and wondering why he stopped caring about me. What did I do to make him go away. It´s probably I´m too needy and I scared him away I´m scaring every man away, at least the ones I care for. It´s maybe that way because I lack confidence. I thought we could be happy together but he probably doesn´t care about me anymore
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Day 3 of NC (15 days since break-up) I feel so bad and lonely without him. I would like to know what he feels. And also I would like to know if he is ever going to reach out to me. And if so, when. Will I move on so much that I won´t be able to come back to him if he does? Will I be able to forgive him? What if he just used me just for a company and never really took our "relationship" seriously? There are so many questions in my head and I know that I won´t get the answers anytime soon... I miss him as a friend too, I miss our conversations, his laugh... But maybe we weren´t meant to be together and if not, then it´s good for me to forget about him and move on. I just wish to know it as soon as possible. I´m wondering if he just said that he isn´t ready for a relationship because he didn´t want to hurt me.
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I do miss him but I´m not going to be with him if he doesn´t want a relationship... Are you serious that he slept with your friends when you refused? omg
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I had a dream about my ex too, it was nice, but reality is different. I feel so sad and I feel like I have lost him forever.
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Day 2 NC (break up 2 weeks ago) I feel so angry that he wanted me to be just his friend after everything we went through.. I really cared about him and I though he cared about me too. If I knew it would end up like this, I probably wouldn´t even want to meet up with him in the first place... But I guess anybody can say that. It´s soooo hard. I don´t know what to do. I suppose I just have to wait and keep NC. It´s over between us for me and if he is ever ready he can call me and we can talk. But I don´t think it will be anytime soon. I´m meeting up with other guys too, but you know I have that feeling that nobody is like him and always compare other guys to him...
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Kayley, you are doing so great... You should be proud of yourself. I think you´ll always have the opportunity to talk about the break up and part as friends, but you need to keep nc untill your feelings are settled and you start forgetting about him. Now just concentrate on yourself, do what feels good to you and be kind to yourself. Every break up is a process and it takes time. If he hurt you forgive him in your heart. Write him a letter in which you´ll tell him everything you want to and then throw it out. You WILL feel better I promise...
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It´s so frustrating because I´m not sure if I´m doing the right thing but I have already been in a "friends with benefits type of relationship" and I never want to be in one again. So at least I was able to say no to him because I know what I don´t want. I think NC is the best thing because if he doesn´t want a real relationship, I´ll be able to forget him much easier and it won´t be hurting me so much seeing him and knowing I can´t be his real girlfriend..
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Update: I told him that I won´t be able to meet up, because I don´t want to be just friends and if we meet up, I would still worry about how things will go. So I´m starting NC again, from tomorrow it will be day 1. Oh, and I was so happy that I made it to day 11 and now I have to start from day 1 again
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Today I broke nc, my ex texted me if we could meet up sometimes and I said yes but I don´t know if I did the right thing, I don´t know what to do. I don´t want to be just "friends" with him, I want a relationship... what should I do??
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Day 11 NC When I was in work I thought about him all the time and missed him so much but as day progressed I started to feel much better and I think I´m finally getting over him. I think it gets better with time and since I´m having dates with other guys, it really helps.