Hello to all,
I am writing this here because I found myself in the situation of being thrown out after a 4 year relationship and watching her date another guy while I was moving out. At this same time I was not only going to a new place and being completely heartbroken, I was starting a new job as well. So the day after I moved into my new place I started my new job and started moving on. 10 days later I even had started a new relationship with a modest, nice and caring girl. Then my ex came in pushing hard to know how I am doing, apologizing. I managed to keep my stronghold for 2 weeks. Then she called me and said she needs to be supported going to the doctor since she had been diagnosed with a probable tumor. I told her that I won't be there for her, told her that I am dating someone else and that her new boyfriend should encourage her. She said they were no longer together. Since I consider my ex the love of my life it was really hard for me to sit there and know I wasn't there for her. I dumped the new girl and met with my ex. We talked, she hugged and kissed me. Then we hung out 3/4 times, she would not hide her desire for me, kissing and cuddling like in the begging 4 years back. She was constantly asking why I love her so much and claiming no one would ever love her in such a way. I gave her her space, never pushed. Didn't talk to her for a week in between seeing each other.
Then she just disappeared. I decided to take control of things and started asking her to decide what she wants. She would not want to see me again. I accidentally saw her wait at a bus stop and took her to her destination with my car. She again complemented me a couple of times on how good I look and was visibly shy as if she first met me, but nothing more.
She disappeared again. Not wanting to talk and hiding from me. So I decided to ask her to make up her mind. So she said that there has been a reason for breaking up and that she only came back because she missed me and because she knows no one would love her like I do (yes she actually says that a lot and in the past I have been blamed by friends and family for being over-caring and too nice to her.), but she said she does not want to get back together.
Everyone says to not be stupid and let go, like I should have done the first time. Though there's a good friend of mine who's a psychologist and knows my situation well, and she says that my ex wants to see me fight for her. So I don't know what to do now. Haven't talked to her for 3 days, I don't even know what to say. So I am NC.