My husband and I argue all the time and always have. We were married at 19, parents at 20 (I was pregnant) and fighting from the beginning. That was almost 22 years ago and things have never gotten better.
There have been several deaths in my family in the past few years including my father, my only sister's husband has brain cancer and only a few months to live, our son recently moved out on his own and we have a teenage daughter who is very active in school which requires a lot of parental support.
In the beginning the fights were about money, or lack of it. As the years went by and we became financially stable it seemed everyone started dying or becoming very ill. In the last 4 years there have been 9 significant deaths, 5 close relatives with cancer, 2 close relatives with brain aneurysms.
This was not a strong marriage to begin with so with the compounding stressors my tolerance seems to have run thin.
Tonight was like it often goes, we got into an argument, he threatened to leave first thing in the morning and I told him good riddance. I even went as far as emptying his drawers into plastic bags for him.
It's like we are two warring countries but neither one is brave enough to actually leave. Once we both cool down we go to our separate corners, literally. Nothing ever gets any better, nothing gets any worse.
We've had sex twice this year. This is something he'd like more of but I cannot stand it. There is just no attraction at all anymore. He has been so cold, distant and manipulative for so long I have no desire for him. I do love him but it's like we're siblings, not husband and wife.
Does anyone have any advice on this?
