Gis0392

Hey kid55, I read your forum 2014 and I commented 2015, I was in the same exact as you were with this whole ex thing accept I'm freaking taking so damn long to get over this break up phase, it's been almost 4 years since the break up, I've seeked professional help I've talked with people many people about this and I'm still so damn stuck, I'm stuck thinking of him crying over him for freaking 4 years straight, it's a habit now and I don't know how to get out. I really don't enjoy myself he's getting married soon, I may be E in this situation but I shouldn't be we were together for 3 years and becuase of my parents stupid stupid culture we left me cuz he saw no future with me and u know it sucks, it sucks so bad, she's the other women not me, she's supposed to be E not me. The emotions get so bad that I literally want to pull my hair out becuase I'm so stuck.

Oh wow thekid, I literally read the entire journal, infact I would save some and get so excited to come back and read, it was like my personal book I can relate to, your relationship resonates a lot with my past relationship,(except I'm a girl) I saw what you did and I know exactly what I'm doing wrong... It's been 1 year and 3 months since the break up and I'm just starting to see some light at the end of the tunnel, really, cried every month for a year and 2 months I was just miserable and to be honest I'm not sure if I've cleaned any of that up, I still think of him, but it hurts and still stings me a bit knowing he's moved on to another girl and is engaged to her (mind you he proposed to her 3 months after they started dating) we dated for about 3 years, and 9 months after the break up he started dating again, he's a med student (2nd yr) I miss him very much and I'm starting to work on myself becuase I'm so sick and tired of being miserable, I had sooo much planned for us, sooo much, I built an empire of hopes and dreams for the both of us only to have him leave me becuase I lost myself in the relationship, I lost myself I loved him more then me and that's when everything started going downhill (just like you mentioned) I still wish that we have a future together but I shouldn't do that to myself, dream dream and dream only to have them destroyed, so yeah, working on myself, and since I come from a really and extremely bad home I'm working on leaving for good so that should give me time to focus on myself, I'm excited and nervous for the new journey as I am planning on leaving everything behind me everything that I have ever known behind me for good, and I hope in that transition I can move forward without looking back I'm just starting to be thankful for the break up and my ex because without I wouldn't be where I am today, I'm very thankful, I've learned so much about myself, and I'm grateful, I just hope that oneday I can find that one person I can love as much as I loved my ex...but that should come right after I form a great relationship with myself. Thanks once again, I reallyyyy enjoyed your journal!! Keep us posted, lol you're like a celebrity here -Giselle