First just to clarify he is NOT blood related. I am 22 years of age and in love with a family member. Here is my story, jumbled but here goes..
How it all began was an innocent conversation one christmas about sex..then he pursued me a bit talking further about it. He is an attractive guy, good looking in his early 40's, we have had sex on occasion and I guess you can say somewhat comitted to a sexual relationship since both of our current ones "lack" so we would sneak around ormeet up when no one else was home and "play"
This was fine up until recently when I was told by him that he wanted to be with me but had made a promise to himself to stay with his wife for the children, one is 14 and other is 8. It just is even worse because out of my entire family, these people are whom I am closest to and talk to and see on a regular basis. Because he said this, I have begun to develop feelings for him as well, and well, here I am. Feeling for a man whom I have absolutely no future with, and even if by slim chance, not for a long long time.
You'd think this would be motivation enough to say goodbye to it all, but no..my stubborn heart will not let me. It hurts so much to be around him and not be able to show my true feelings but also hurts to stop seeing him and to be around him also not being able to show my feelings, and not having ANY opportunity to be with him. I will always see him because it's family.
I dont know what to do, part of me wants to be his SO bad..the other knows there is no chance.
