At my breaking point, Call her?? Plz respond

[dmvcc1]

I am pretty sure I am at a point of no return. 2 months ago, my gf ended things, well kind of ended things...gave me the I need space routine...i do not think that there is anyone else but who knows these days..i tell myself anything is possible. We dated about 6 years ago for bout a year and then broke up, 4 years apart, she had a baby, 1 year ago, started dating again...everything was going perfectly...i thought at least...then one night...bam..just like that...she lied to me about where she was going and then the next night told me she did not want to be in a relationship right now...she wanted to remain in contact and I told her no...I had done that for four years and could not do it again...we did make plans to see each other about a month after this all happened for a sat. night and at 8:30 that night, i called her at work to see what time we would meet and she cancelled on me...maybe she was telling the truth, but i dont know...for the next hour, i told her how i did not think it was a good idea to even talk anymore, that she kept hurting me, not on purpose, but her actions were hurtful...at the end of the phone call, she did say she would call me in a few days, that was almost 2 months ago...i have been very good about not picking up the phone, in the middle of august, her daughter turned two and I did mail a birthday card thinking that would prompt a call from her...but nothing, not even a phone call to say thank you...but I miss her so much and I thought it would be even a little bit easier by now and it is not...i am sure if she was the one that said dont call me, i would have not either, but still, she said she would and I sent the card to no avail...i just need some closure i guess..i need to know why..something to help me move past it...even if there is someone else, it may crush me but will help me to realize that she is gone...just tough to do after you have talked for seven years without any breaks...i miss her...any suggestions...tks.

DM

[Mar]

Unfortunately, you've come to all the conclusions yourself, I think, from the sound of it, you just need to hear it confirmed. And I HATE to say things like this, but from what you've posted, it sounds like it's over for her. I can't begin to guess what's going on in her mind or her heart....it could be that she's avoiding contact because she just hasn't figured it out herself yet. But it sounds like you've made all the right efforts, the right words, everything you thought you could do to bring her back, and if she's not coming back or responding, she's got another agenda.

 

Closure is difficult to find in this situation.....ANY breakup situation, for that matter. But you have to regain your stability and your happiness, and there's no set timetable to tell you when to do this. I suppose it's just that whenever you've reached your breaking point of waiting and hoping and wondering, your mind and your heart will start to move on, looking to regain some happiness and content. It takes longer without the closure, but it DOES happen eventually. It's the "grin and bear it" part that hurts in that time.

 

I think you're close to, if not at, that point. Concentrate on what makes you happy (I can hear it from here......"SHE makes me happy!") but there WAS life before your ex. And if you need to talk about it, TALK. Talk to friends, talk to US. We can definitely sympathize and offer some hopefully useful insights or just general boosters for getting out of the feelings you're having. But ultimately, your heart will decide when it's time to heal itself and find someone to fill that hole and fill that need for love again. But in the meantime, we're here to help in any way we can.

[Genesis]

Do not call her, she was not woman enough to tell you to your face that things were over! She has a new man now, I am sure. Thats what the all the lies she told you indicate. Try to move on, do not call her. She wants you on the side, so she can date others and get knocked up by other men, to fall back on you when she has no one. Move on.

[gettinthroughit]

please read my post

link removed

and please don't call her, I went through the exact same needs and wants

but when I had that realisation I felt so much better after it....

 

don't call, in my opinion no good can come from it