GOING TO CHEAT AGAIN (I have added more...please read page2

[SweetypieEnlightenedOne]

Keep in mind that I took him back and now we are supposed to be trusting eachother and working through this..but then...

 

 

 

Once again...just like before..when I found out about my current boyfirend was e-mailing this girl on line...I had another dream that he had another account on this thing called link removed. I was right..however it did say the member page was deleted. I confronted him about it and gave him absolute hell. He said "As you can see that was the same name of the other account that I had and I tossed it away." I didnt even use it..BUt I was so Pissed because he still should have confessed that he had the sh#@ in the first place. I'm so hurt. Maybe I am being unfair due to the fact that I did say we were going to start over and this is after the fact but I am just not able to trust this man..I AM PISSED..

 

Anyone who knows me on this forum knows that I dont' curse..so if you see me cursing or almost swaring its cause i'm 38 degrees hot.

[pimpcess]

Hey sweetypie,

 

It's obvious to me, that you do not trust this man whats so ever, if u don't have trust in your relationship, what do you have??

 

You seem to be incredibly frustrated with him right now, does he know how u really feel inside?

 

I think a long, intense talk is overdue.

 

You need to ask him whether he can be the person you need him to be, because at the moment it would seem he's enjoying a single life?

 

Sorry If I'm wrong but there wasn't a lot of insight in your post.

 

But ask yourself; Is he what u want? Do u want someone that loves and cherishes you, shows you affection and respect, someone that you're enough for?

 

If yes, then is he the right man?

 

Good luck and I really hope you feel better soon.

 

~Pimpcess~

[Slypknot]

I feel for ya Sweety... Doing what you're doing is not only a serious challenge (overcoming distrust) it's also very emotionally draining.

 

To be honest though - if you feel that much anger you may not really be ready to 'start over' with him. I know for me personally I can't do what you're doing. Once I'm burned, I'm burned and will never truly regain trust for someone that close to me. I've tried before and found that when it really comes down to it - I can't trust them like I did before..ever again. So I end up beating my head against a wall trying to overcome this fear I have of trusting them again...which is silly - there's a reason I'm afraid of trusting them!

 

Sorry to be so bleak - I do relate to your frustration as I've tried to do it myself before - just never had good luck at it I'm afraid.

[BERTO]

ONCE TRUST IS BROKEN EVEN IF IT HAS TO DO WITH SOMETHING SO SMALL LIKE THE INTERNET YOU CAN NEVER REPAIR THAT TRUST AGAIN. IT SAD BUT TRUE. AND YOU HAVE TO LOVE YOURSELF ENOUGH TO SAY I'M BETTER THEN THIS. XI'M 23 YRS OLD MALE I HAVE 2 BOYS BEEN MARRIED ONCE TO NEITHER MOTHER OF MY SONS. I'VE HAD TO LEARN THE HARD WAY. ENDING RESULTS I'M AWAY FROM ONE OF MY SONS HAVE CUSTODY OF 1 AND I'M LIVING A BETTER LIFE NOW DUE TO THE FACT THAT I KEPT SAYING TO MYSELF I DESERVE BETTER AND BELIEVING THAT I AM WORTH MUCH MORE YOU DO THE SAME AND YOU'LL SEE IT WILL ALL BE OK

[pimpcess]

Berto- What a lovely post that was, well done, it was inspirational, I'm glad your life is better now and you've learnt from the past, just wanted to say well done.

 

~Pimpcess~

[Genesis]

I have a account at link removed but I never use it. I signed up and just have not gotten around to logging on yet. I have a friends who's BF, had a full page with pictures on link removed saying that he was single.

 

He is very handsome, and in his picture he had his shirt off with all his mucles to show to the world!!! She was really mad, he had to delete the page! Well she forgave him. I donot know what to tell you. I know once someone cheats it is hard to trust them. You begin to question every little action.

 

Maybe you should reconsider the relationship, or be more forgiving. If he is talking to girls on online, you should tell him that it makes you feel uneasy and ask him to stop.

[Slypknot]

Of course you feel that way which is why trying to make something like this work is near to impossible.

 

Personally I don't believe 'shady' people change that rapidly - unless something seriously major has occurred in their lives to make them stop and change....like prison, getting sued, car wrecks, near death, etc. Just getting caught is usually not enough to make someone stop cheating.

 

But I wouldn't suggest doing the same back to him... cause then you're no better. It's best to either swear it off and try to work through the distrust - or leave him and start something new with someone else.