Speed dating. Any exeriences?

[longhaircats]

Since I am single and looking, a friend of mine who is also single asked me if I wanted to try a speed dating. Apparently you'll get a "score" based on how many people wanted to date you at the end, and her male friends tried it together so they can compete each other which person gets higher score. I guess it is just for fun?? Just curious....

[Jayar]

I've done it. It's not a "score" you just check off whether you want to meet each person you sit with again or not, and he does the same. Then if there is a match (as in, you checked him and he checked you) then contact info is exchanged. You will not know who selects you if you don't also select them.

 

As for the actual experience? I found it disappointing... I was not happy with the quality of men that were there (in terms of physical appearance and education/career mostly) and I'm going to try a different service... One for which the daters have to meet certain physical and educational standards. Might sound shallow, but I have no desire to spend that kind of money to sit down with 20+ men I know I won't want to see again.

 

There is an actual service in my city that has an "elite event" where, if 75% or more of the people who "dated" you at one of their events checked "yes" then you get invited to this exclusive event. I may try that next time. It would be nice to know that the quality of singles at the event next time will be more in line of what I'm looking for. Those events aren't cheap!

[charley]

I tried that about a month ago. There was no score at the place where I did it. Well, not in the way you describe.

 

It does not matter how many people pick you or how many you pick, what matters is how many mutual picks.

 

The fact that your guy friend told you they were competing for score should tell you everything you need to know about the value of speed dating right there. I will say other things about it, but I think you've already answered your own question about it's value right there.

 

I had started a thread about my experience earlier. Try it. It's an interesting one time experience and the ideal playground for players. Truly, it was an interesting evening, but interesting does not necessarily equate to good.

 

I met a couple obvious players that night. I also met the desperately shy who make my shyness look minor. Those poor shy people don't have a chance in a 5 minute competitive thing like that. I also met some seriously desperate people.

 

One of my platonic lady friends went with me so we'd both have some moral support afterwards. We both had an interesting evening, and that's all we had. Well, I did manage to catch a terrible cold that later turned into bronchitis. Thankfully, I'm better now.

 

By all means, try it once and let us know how it goes, but don't expect anything beyond an interesting evening.

[swtp9305]

I'm quite new at this but i read your message regarding speed dating. I find it add just thinking about it. I am contemplating it but there is a part of me that holds back. Tell me more about your "interesting evening"? How long have you been single?

Hope to hear from you soon

 

Alina

[longhaircats]

Sounds like speed dating is just for fun, nothing serious. I'd try it when I'm really bored. Hey Alina, I've been single for about 6 months. I've been in long-term relationships in most of my adult life, so I'm quite new to this too. Hope you are doing well.

 

Cats

[charley]

Actually, I did meet one nice lady there that night, but she was more shy by far than I am, and I have a little bit of an initial shyness problem myself.

 

I was reasonably smooth until I got to her. Then I froze up like a deer in headlights. I'm working on not doing that anymore, but the stress of 5 minutes and a buzzer makes it nearly impossible for anyone, but a seasoned player. Shy people can't function under that time pressure.

 

I am friends with one of her friends (small town) who later told me that she is more shy than I am and she was frozen up far worse than I was.

 

The whole 5 mintue time limit and the buzzer every 5 minutes added a lot of unnecessary stress to the whole thing.

 

My platonic woman friend gave this appraisal of the guys there. She said there were only two nice guys and I was one of them. There were only two reasonably good looking guys and I was one of them, but the other was literally quite drunk. One of the other women told me that was better than the prior time because at least no married guys showed up. i.e. - there is no screening.

 

When I earlier said it was an interesting evening, I was thinking of the Chinese curse, "May you lead an interesting life."