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no onesgoingtoread this. ill write it anyhow on the off chance. so ive completely come to terms with my past and all of the relationships that i was childish and immature about but heres the thing... im still the same miserable guy.. i now work at a job i absolutely love everything about, i have a great girlfriend who is everything i could ever want, i have the best friendshere that i could hope for and im glad i didnt move to Florida for college.. my family is so great now.. but something is wrong... and idont know what. i cant trust my girlfriend and im always paranoid about dumb things and i feel like i cant see the end of this no matter howgood it gets.. i feel like my only escape is music, like its the one thing thatcan make me happy and nothing else ever will.. i feel like theres something missing. its not "my exgirlfriend did this" and "i missthis girl" and "this friend doesnt talk to me anymore" crap. its like... a hole. right in the center of me. especially when im left alone for even a moment. its almost like i feel used.. maybe im just an extremely dependant person? maybe i need company at all times.. maybe im just meant to never be alone with my thoughts. everything feels alright when im aroundsomeone like my girlfriend but i always end up feeling blank, colorless and like im missing a part of me.

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I once had a friend that felt similar in the way that you do (from what I understand that is). She felt like there was always something missing even though the people around her were fantastic. Sometimes because of this "missing something", she would lash out and take out her frustration out on other people.


Then, she discovered what really meant to her; her passion: the love of animals. She began to volunteer with the SPCA rescuing hurt/abandoned animals and it brough a new light to her that she never discovered before. Perhaps this may work for you. Channel your energy into something you're passionate about. I realize that you're into music, then maybe take up guitar lessons. Perhaps you need to feel inspired and the best place to look is where your passions lie.


I'm not going to guarantee that this will work for you, but it may be a start. Good luck. We're all here for you!

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