Confused

[Bluesteel705]

Well we work at the same place, I do nights and she does early mornings. She'd complain to me if I didnt giver her a kiss goodbye when I left in the morning, and shed usualy text me when she was finishing to come and meet her in town for a coffee or whatever, and we usualy went out together once or twice a week. She's never said I was smothering her, and she loved anything I did that was romantic, but I didnt overdo it. Then she went on holiday and told me everyday she was there that she missed me, then when she got back she semed distant when I met her the next day, and I couldnt say or do anything right with her, but I out it down to jet-lag. And thats the last time I saw her outside work and had a conversation with her. It was just so sudden.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

When people say smothering often its an excuse provided the "smotherer" is not actually smothering. Its a gut feeling and is translated into "I am not that into you."

 

 

Maybe but not always.

 

See: my post about personally being smothered in this same thread. No smoke and mirrors, no projections, no justifications. Just straighforward, plain ol', it was exactly what I said it was. He was smothering me. Period.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

In this case it sounds pretty clear cut that she met someone else and that's why she broke up. Just be glad you found out about the other guy, you wouldn't want to be hanging out there in the dark, for sure.

[Bluesteel705]

I know and in a way I am, but its small comfort

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

I know and in a way I am, but its small comfort

 

No doubt. But that's kind of flakey to all of a sudden meet someone else and leave you for him, anyway. Find someone who thinks things through a bit more, and isn't quite so flighty.

[Bluesteel705]

Yeah, theres that, but this was the first girlfriend I've had in a while, because I do have trouble trusting women after several bad experiences, and this really really really hasnt helped at all.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

Yeah. Well eventually you will probably meet someone who thinks you're great, and isn't looking to trade you in. It's hard for both men and women because of past experiences, but you've just got to perservere. If you shut yourself off and don't take a risk, then you will not reap any rewards. Right now, maybe you just want to hang out with your friends for a while though, and look to date other people after a while.

[Bluesteel705]

Thats pretty much my plan, I'll be ok in a day or two, its just these next couple of days, and the fact I have to see her when she starts work in 3 hours