What is the point of learning if I don't incorporate it?

[BlueWolf]

It’s safe to say that today wasn’t exactly the best of days but it’s okay, because it happens and it should be taken as a learning experience (which is ironic considering the topic of the subject).

 

Either way, I NEED to break out of some bad/old “nice guy” habits. These don’t get you anywhere pretty much. I’ve been reading, of course, and I know exactly what I need to do to stand out in front of a group (in a good way).

However, as soon as I get that exposure it is as if everything I had learned evaporates.

Literally.

 

I know how it feels to have the feeling as if you are in complete control of what you want to do and know exactly where something is going in a social interaction. I get that feeling most of the time when I’m with friends, etc.

 

However today I had to visit my school’s girls basketball team (their coach specifically) because I’ll be their manager.

And yeah, pretty much, what I had learned had just gone away.

 

It’s frustrating because you know exactly what you need to do and you would tell yourself what needs to happen but then you just don’t follow through with it! It has happened way too often. (That's in terms of body language, voice tone, and even wittiness! I can be the wittiest/most fun guy you ever saw but damn it is annoying when I can't follow through with that!)

 

So how do I break out of it? Suggestions?

 

Thanks for reading…

[KillTheSilence]

i get that crap happenin to me too sometimes. it's becoming less as i think about it more though.

 

most people can't do anything right without practice. there's no way in hell i'd be able to talk to my friends in a casual way if i hardly ever talked at all.

 

and if that analogy doesn't help, i used to try doing facial expressions and see what it looks like under the mirror this one time. i felt stupid and would've flipped if somebody saw me doin that, but it sort of raised my self esteem in a way that allows me to think straight.

[jimpster2005]

So you have difficulty fully relaxing in new situations and with new people? Sounds like you're normal to me!

 

Look at it logically - everything takes practise. From learning to walk, to picking up a new skill or indeed learning about new people enough to interact with them on level you're both comfortable with.

 

That helps me get through difficult situations like that - and it always, always gets easier. Just remember that you can't expect to get along in every situation - no-one's perfect!

[NJRon]

Yeah, don't get stuck in analysis paralysis. When you see the solution to a problem, start doing and stop thinking so much. You can think more later

[BlueWolf]

Today:

 

Same interaction different attitude. =)

More relaxed = much better results and outlook of how things are.

 

More practice wouldn't hurt.