I get it!!!

[Jayar]

You know that "aloofness" or "indifference" you're supposed to treat your ex with if you want them back? Well it's a hard feeling to muster when you're just newly out of a relationship (especially a long one) but I GET IT now!!!

 

It's that way you talk to your ex when they call and want to see you... But you're interested in someone else that is wildly interested in you!

 

I met someone at the mall the other day, and I don't think it can be serious (I guess it could become so, but it isn't yet) and I'm not REALLY ready to date anyone anyway. But it's as if my ex just KNEW this was happening, and he called me last night wondering if maybe I wanted to get together after I'm finished the move I'm currently working through.

 

For the FIRST TIME since the break up I truly wasn't fazed to hear from him. I simply said "sure, I guess so..." and we made a little small talk before I let him go and continued packing. I love him immensely, of course, and I don't know if we ever WILL end up being together. But for the first time because I didn't feel hopeless, like my life had ended, and sure enough there were STILL great guys that are interested in me even if HE didn't want me, I think I conveyed a sense of indifference more convinceingly than any "act" I had tried to put on. Enough that he even asked if something was wrong!

 

So friends, when you're trying to muster the correct emotion with which to speak to your ex, think "new relationship" and think butterflies and shyness and first kisses... Think of the way you would have spoken to any one of your past exes after you met your most recent ex... That's the emotion you want to convey in your voice and actions. I get it now...

[SarahRose]

Yes I agree. It is hard to muster that up but if you think about how you talk to just a friend it is easier to do.

 

I guess your voice potrays to them that you think they are all that and they pick up on it.

 

I think it is better to keep a bit of aloofness as not to let the relationship get unbalanced.