Does He Get It?

[rachel1256]

I've been posting how I've been strong, not called or texd my ex without him doing so first. so far, I've been better each day.

 

So, he calls me yesterday morning and I didn't answer. I blocked him from my email last Friday, and I guess he sent me an email. He said so in his message yesterday morning, sounding really down (or just his unhappy self) saying he wrote me an email, he hasn't heard from me, doesn't know where I am, etc etc....

 

When I finally called him back, he was with a friend, and was willing to talk, but I told him to call me when his buddy left. He said ok. That was yesterday at lunch time, and I haven't heard from him.

 

So, to my question- Does he get that we are done, that when he threw me out of his house a week ago last sunday, that that was it for me. I even wrote him an email that sunday night saying his ignoring me, not letting me back into his place over a STUPID fight, was the last straw. For the past 6 months now, thats how he handles arguments- by making me leave then ignoring me.why, if I supposedly make him so angry does he still make these lame attempts to contact me?

 

Should I call or email him one last time to say we don't need to talk anymore. He hasn't called me since yesterday, and I don't know if he's done with me. does he actually need to hear the words "broken up." He even called me babe yesterday on the phone, so who knows what he is thinking. Deep down, I know that after all he has said and done to me, he doesn't even deserve a goodbye..

[shydragonfly2]

Hi, I read your post, and it sounds to me like he gets it, he is just trying to make you chase him. And if he has treated you badly as you say you think he truly doesnt even deserve goodbye, then dont give him one. It sounds like its possible that he thinks he can treat you however he wants and you will always come back to him....

 

You deserve to be treated with kindness and respect, it doesnt sound like you get either from this man.

 

Just my thoughts...

[rachel1256]

shydragonfly, in the past, I have always come back to him. Each time, no matter how awful he treated me, all he had to do was say he missed me, and there i was. Its just that this time, I havent even called him, didn't respond to the email he sent, and didn't get upset, nor show it, that he didn't call back yesterday.

I don't want to be mean to anyone, no matter what, but I don't know if this is an exception, given that with him, there is no right answer. I guess I was just wondering if even a guy like him, if he seems to have not caught on, deserved a firm answer.

I guess this feeling is only natural in the breakup process, having questions, feeling bad, thats why I came here. I just don't want to do anything stupid if its not even necessary.

Thanks for the reply.

[shydragonfly2]

Well, hang in there. since you have always gone back to him right away, that is undoubtedly what he is expecting. If he does contact you again, you may want to tell him, its over, please dont contact me anymore. Keep it brief, non-emotional, etc. Especially if you think it would help you to move on knowing you said it clearly...

[andrew05151]

I wish my ex thinks like you...

 

I would never throw her out, ever. I would never ignore her. We were having a lot of stupid fights, and a lot of them were my fault, or my overreacting. But I always loved her, I always told her that no matter what. And she left me for her ex-ex.

 

You sound like you've been emotionally abused by this guy...yet, you're still willing to go back. You're still willing to keep loving him. He doesn't even deserve it!

 

Even though she hurt me a lot...and betrayed my trust...I still want to make things work...I still love her. She said she loved me, too...but it wasn't the same anymore.

 

But, I think...me and you might be similar in the way that we're both willing to sacrifice our self esteem, ourselves, for another person...someone that we love. We feel weak, but we're stronger than our ex's in that manner. Our ex's took the weak way out, they don't have the courage to fight for love.

 

I think that if there are someones out there like you, who IS willing to fight...and there are someones out there like me, who IS willing to fight..to make things work no matter what. We're bound to run into eachother one of these days, right?