Is This Overreacting?

[lizzy22]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years now.

 

Things are overall pretty good between us.

 

He doesn't really have a "real" job. He can make up to $200 a day if he is called into work, but sometimes he only works 3 times a week. to my knowledge, both him and his parents have income properties that give him money each month as well.

 

Anyways, I worl 5 days a week, and the weekend is the time we see each other. the problem i face is he is OBSESSED WITH THE ECONOMY and is always on his computer, always watching CNN, and he is constantly checking stock prices and live ticker! He is always talking about economic affairs when his mom calls, when his friends call, and its all i hear.

 

He tells me that one day we will be rich and be able to go on trips, but for now, this is what he has to do to make money and he needs to do this....

 

I would rather he had a 9-5 because at least he would have the weekend free! he has a 7 day a week job, and he doesnt take a break.

 

We go to eat, we get coffee during the day, but thats it. Im either sitting around his place (i live kinda far so i can't just go home) while he is on the computer, or we are watching CNN or market watch when he isn't. We only have sex now once a week, and its getting old!

 

Ive tried to talk to him about it, but he gets mad and says I need too much of his attention.

 

Am I overreacting? I just feel that what he is doing is becoming an obsession

[lizzy22]

No response tells me I am....

 

its probably a stupid thing to dwell on, but it bothered me.

[Scotcha]

I don't think it's a stupid thing to dwell on. If I recall correctly you've posted about this several times and so obviously you are unhappy about it.

 

Is it because his working habits/career do not or could not make you feel safe, stable, and secure? I can understand that. Never knowing exactly how much money was going to be brought home could lead to a lot of extra stresses.

 

You can't ask him to change though. If this is how he wants to live his life it's how he gets to do it. You need to figure out if you want to stick around for the ride.

[lovecrazy]

Well it doesnt seem like you are over reacting. I just wouldnt go off on him and expode on something like this.

 

Sounds like you crave more attention. Or maybe you two should have set times, that you do this and that. Tell him to pick times for his favorite show, so you can do something else. Usually doing the same thing all the time gets old very quickly at least for me.

 

My boyfriend and I usually spend most of time together on the weekends! Because we too live so far apart. But our jobs are about 30 minutes away from each other. So I try and have lunch with him at least once a week, and stay at his house once or twice during the week. He used to always play World Of Warcraft. And I would sit there bored out of my mind. Finally after about amonth of this. I told him it was getting on my nerves, and that he needed to figure out what he was going to do to give me the attention I wanted and needed to be satisfied.

 

I wouldnt just say its getting on your nerves. I would just simply say something like "Honey I think we need to do something different, maybe go out to eat tonight with this and that. I understand him having a job and working alot. With my boyfriends job he is on call sometimes, and he was this past weekend, we still were able to go out, but he was always on the phone. Which was kind of annoying, but I tolerate it becasue it is his job.

 

If that is how he makes money, and he is always responsible then there is nothing wrong with it. Maybe a 9-5 job isnt him at all. And if you guys were to get married he would be able to take care of the kids during the day as well as do his "job" that he has now. So I mean his job isnt all that bad, just sounds like he needs to only give you small doses of it at once. ya know?

 

Just try talkint to him about limiting the Money Market TV shows. or being on his computer!

[lizzy22]

Thats a good idea to set times that we do things. He is pretty good at doing something if I want to do it, maybe I just need to bring more things to his home that will occupy my attention.

 

Thank you both for the post!