Help... Having a step back today...:(

[coldheart]

Well yesterday I hung out with a good friend of mine that works in the same industry as me. She is VERY attractive and we always had this thing for each other. So she came over the new house yesterday as a house warming visit, and what started as a few drinks and talking ended up in a homerun sleepover. It felt strange having another woman in bed next for me for the first time since my breakup, and quite honestly it made me think more about my ex.

 

I really enjoyed this person's company, and we are just special friends, but I can't help thinking about the intimacy with my ex when I was with her. All my friends tell me that no matter how much fun or distraction I have, I revert back to thinking and mentioning her, and it's getting old real fast. I know that they understand me and just want to see me move on already and be happy, but it's much easier to talk about than experience one's self.

 

I really want to get over my ex very soon, but these petty distractions are doing little to "erase" the image of the person I love, and in most cases only intensifies the nostalgia. Anybody understand what I am going through? Is it normal?

 

-CH

[acb_22]

I completely understand. I've been on 2 dates since my breakup ... and both of the dates were AWESOME. Laughing, talking, drinking, etc. There was never a dull moment. Each of the two people I went out with were obviously interested in going out again ... however, spending time with them, made me think about the ex ... and thus, I have kept the friendships going ... but made it clear I wasn't interested in anything other than being friends. It's been two months since my breakup ... a relationship that lasted 2 years. I'm not sure what it's going to take ... but I can't get her out of my mind. There are reminders EVERYWHERE, from the songs on the radio, to landmarks, to memories I will cherish to the grave.

[whatchamacallit]

Oh wow...and I completely understand too. I'm trying to get over someone...the love of my life. I went out with a guy in February and had a good time, but he could see right through me that I was distracted and he told me so. I wish I could get over my guy. I wish I could have a blood or heart transplant that would do the trick. Oh, if it would be that simple. It's hard for me to move on. Especially, since he's right here at work. He's moved on and has someone new in his life. It hurts to know this. I myself am interested in someone locally and we send messages back and forth by e-mail, but I still can't get over the ex. I'm pulling my hair out!!!!!!!!!! Coldheart, you're not the only one.

[jman311]

Oh yeah, I feel ya. Same boat here. Even after nearly 3 months my head can be saturated with thoughts of my ex even when I feel I should be completely distracted and moving on. And yes, oddly, it often surfaces the most when I'm having a great time and shouldn't be thinking about her. In my head it works kinda like "Hey, I'm feeling pretty happy now ... hmm, when did I used to be happy like this ... oh yeah, with her, ugh" - very distracting! Unfortunatley I think it's just how it is ... I don't know what else to do except keep at it and hope it will eventually subside.

[deejay74]

wow, all of you are describing similar experiences that i have been going through as well. makes me feel better that what i am feeling is "normal".

 

coldheart, i know exactly what you mean - i got involved with a girl a few weeks ago and got intimate with her, but she could feel that i wasn't that into her and then decided to stop "seeing" me. i was fine with it and we still talk but after being with her physically, it made me think about my ex more.

 

i miss the connection and intimacy that i shared with my ex.

[whatchamacallit]

it's torture