Games..

[munchkin]

OK I know people keep putting up posts about this but I still dont get it!

 

If you like someone and want to be with them why would you back off?

If you do back off and they respond by being a bit needy you dump them....why surely this shows they are genuine and like you?

If you back off and they dont respond...you dump them coz you think they are not interested......what if the other person thinks oh they have backed off they are not interested I will leave it?

How would you ever get with someone?

 

If I like somone I want to be with them, spend time with them, stay in touch, not ignore them and see what happens!!!

[Scotcha]

I'm not much for games either but it's not backing off to the point where you are rude or ignoring someone. It's more like giving them a chance to come to you.

 

I've never really done this actually and I've never really had any problems. Except I have been told that I am too clingy.. But this was by people I was truly incompatible with so I don't mind.

 

If two people are equally attracted to each other I don't think this is ever really an issue, at least in my experience.

[kellbell]

Usually people recommend this is to ensure the person does not appear too available, needy, or clingy. The classic push-pull dating game. I do believe a little mystery is good and letting the person come to you.

 

But as Scotcha pointed out...if both persons truley like each other and are compatiable, games should not be necessary.

[jubeanation]

The whole push thing is very much a technique people use. USually because they're tried being purely honest and all, and come off with very uninterested love interests. Hence the need to create mystery.

[Markers]

in my experience, especially the people who are new to dating tend to go drastically wrong with playing games. First they are themselves and don't play any games, and things work out perfectly. Then, however, the friends of the girl start telling her that "hey you don't wanna be so easy!! Play hard to get!!" thinking it's the ultimate truth because they read it from Cosmopolitan or whatever. Then the poor girl goes and plays hard to get, the guy goes like "huh she doesn't talk to me that much anymore, ignoring" and flips. Then the friends of that guy go like "oh wow she's a real catch!! Not every guy seem to can get her!! You must use this PUA mASF GFTOW SHB OMG TT strat we read from link removed!!!"

 

and then the poor guy tries a stupid line and flirts with other girls in front of her, she is forced to assume that the guy doesn't care anymore. Everyone is unhappy, save the friends who are glad that their friends now too are into the "1000-dating-secrets-you-never-knew" that brings visible results in only 3 days with 100% guarantee.

 

The point? The techniques somewhat work, but you shoot your own leg with them. All don't know this and decide to shoot anyways, and you just gotta cope with it and hope you find someone who's not too big into these.

[Dating Coach]

OK I know people keep putting up posts about this but I still dont get it!

 

If you like someone and want to be with them why would you back off?

If you do back off and they respond by being a bit needy you dump them....why surely this shows they are genuine and like you?

If you back off and they dont respond...you dump them coz you think they are not interested......what if the other person thinks oh they have backed off they are not interested I will leave it?

How would you ever get with someone?

 

If I like somone I want to be with them, spend time with them, stay in touch, not ignore them and see what happens!!!

 

go to link removed and learn a few things there. You don't have to play games, in fact, games are discouraged. But you do want to demonstrate SELF CONTROL. That is HUGE.

 

For instance, if you throw yourself at someone, then you aren't showing self control, you are sending them a message that you are desperate, needy, and clingy. Plus, you just might be moving a bit too fast for someone. It shows your inexperiance.

 

Or, if you are clingy and needy at first, and then try to "fix" things by pulling back, then you look silly like you have no idea what you are doing, and you come accross as weird.

 

If you never show interest, and you are distant and cold, then a person isn't likely going to waste time with you.

 

Show SELF CONTROL. If you like someone, don't call them nonstop, don't act desperate. If you just start seeing someone and you act like your whole life is about THEM already, (ie calling nonstop, talking several hours several times a day, contstantly worrying about them, etc) then you show no self control. You should have your own life, and if you start seeing someone then that is just a small part of your life at this time. Set up a date, go on the date, then once it's over, you had fun. Leave it at that. Call back in a couple days, set up another date. Repeat. Show self control.

[SxcLady]

Good question ... What is with the games???

[jubeanation]

Um... see above (Y)

[Spugly Fuglet]

With same games are port of there power thing, me I run a mile from any one who starts playing mind games.

 

I like to say what I mean and Mean what I say