LDR becoming a short distance relationship

[l.hu]

Hello everyone! First I wanted to say that I think this is a great place and normally don't post on forums like this, but something about this place particularly drew me, and I feel comfortable openly asking questions and receiving ya'lls advice. So onto my inquiry ...

 

I've been in a long distance relationship for about a year and 3 months now. Some background info: He's a 26 yr. old college graduate with a stable career and I'm a 21 yr. old undergrad student. When I'm at school, we're 1 1/2 hours away. My "home" (where my parents live) is an hour away, and during the summer I work at a summer camp that's only 15 minutes away, but since it's an overnight camp I don't have the luxuries of free evenings and days to spend with him as much as we'd like, obviously. I was also in NYC this past fall, but he visited several times on his own and for work related trips. Currently on average we get to see each other once a week.

 

My question is that despite all this distance, we have a very healthy relationship but we know it won't last like this forever. I'm already looking into grad schools in his local area, but I was curious as to how might a relationship change that has been long-distance for so long and then suddenly becomes short distanced? I've heard stories from other friends in similar situations. Some of the relationships just fall apart because they can't handle being that close all the time - they're not use to it. And there are those that end up working out, but they have a lot of other issues to work through first.

 

We're both busy people with lots of hobbies and activities as well as just generally independent. But when we are together we can't get enough of each other and, for example, when I was in NYC he visited for Thanksgiving for 5 consecutive days. We were together every single moment and did not fight once or even feel tired with each other.

 

So there are good signs that it might not be that huge a deal, but I was curious as to any advice any of you might be able to give, what to expect, or even some own personal stories of having an LDR become an SDR.

 

Thank you!!

Laura

[Meow18]

I've been in the same situation as you. My boyfriend went away to school and we were an hour away. Then he would live at home over the summers, which we would then be about 10 minutes from each other. We were long distance for about 2 years. We are no longer long distance.

 

Honestly, if you have a good relationship, there's no need to worry. The only things that I can think of is that you might take each other more for granted just because you get to see each other more often. But that's really easy to work around if you feel that starting to happen.

 

If you think about it, the most important things in a relationship are trust and communication. You obviously must have the trust if you have such a healthy relationship long distance.

 

There are so many ways to look at it. Sometimes I think that being long distance for awhile really helps just because you know how much you miss that person. When you are always together, sometimes you can forget that.

 

It works out with some relationships, and not with others. But the thing is, when it doesn't work out, there are reasons behind it. If you feel like you and your boyfriend really have a good relationship, why not try moving closer? I mean, obviously you can't be long distance forever.

 

Try not to worry about it. If you have problems, work them out if possible. That's how any relationship is.

[daffycat]

Hi,

 

sounds like you guys have a very healthy, balanced relationship...

 

I have a long distance relationship, though unluckily for me, we are not one hour, but 11 hours away from each other...We know this situation doesn't really work, so we are making decisions about moving to be in the same place...either me moving near him, or vice versa.

 

I am not freaked out by this, because the majority of our long distance relationship has been spent planning a future...it was always going to be an interim measure, temporary...

 

I don't think you should be scared by the move; think about it as the next step in your relationship. As long as you two both maintain the personal boundaries that have sustained your relationship so far, such as your hobbies etc, you should be fine.

 

Just one thing though...make sure you go to the grad school of your choice, for your reason, i.e. the best school for you, rather than the nearest school to him.

 

Your education is very, very important, and something that really will affect the rest of your life!

 

good luck and I hope it works out great for you guys!

[preeti]

firstly its wonderful to know that u guys have made it so far...... the first few months are really difficult in a LDR...i'm in one n i should know........slowly u kind of get used to it.....now it seems ur situation is about to change...its natural for u to get apprehensive.But remember the initial phases of the relationship?.....weren't u plagued by apprehensions then???...so u see........ things will work out just fine....Have faith in urself..ur guy n most importantly in ur relationship....all the best !!!!