Feeling Lost and Hopeless

[Lion-Guy]

It has been almost 3 months now since my breakup. We were together for 3 years. I thought I was starting to heal well and generally feeling better. But today I seemed to hit the bottom again. I tried dating a new girl, only to be shot down after a few dates. Life seems so dull and boring. I still don't have very many friends in the new city I live in and the ones I do have I only see once/twice a week. ( I think this is what is holding me back the most).

 

To make matters worse, my ex is dating a new guy already. Recently my ex had the audacity to send me an invite to her friend's fundraising party. Why would she do such a thing? I haven't seen her since we broke up. Is she trying to send me some kind of message? I am not about to talk to her face to face, while there is another guy in the picture.

 

Also, she sent me a generic update e-mail that she sends to all of her best friends. She mentions nothing of a new guy, but talks about how she is busy having lots of fun and making new friends. Why did she feel the need to send me this?

 

I have held strict NC, have improved my image, workout everyday, have excelled in school, have tried dating again, but still I seem to fail at being happy. Any suggestions or words of encouragement would be helpful.

[pos69sum]

it is insulting when they seem to 'flaunt' their new love interest in your face like that. it just seems like a really rude and insensitive thing to do. i have had a number of exes act that way - doesn't she know she is hurting you by inviting you to this fundraiser?

[friscodj]

Wow, she's being really insensitive. You're better off without her man! You need to cut this woman off, at least until you have healed and moved on.

 

It's tough being shot down when you start dating again. Maybe focus on yourself and doing things you enjoy until you feel more at peace with this. Find enjoyment in being alone. Usually when that happens a new love interest comes along.

 

NC will definitely help, including blocking her emails and don't read anything she sends you. Then get on the Internet and start meeting new people, that worked for me when I moved to a new city.

 

Time will heal your troubles. Just be patient and steer the course.

 

Now as far as the new guy and the flaunting of her happiness like that. In poker, when someone acts like they have a good hand, it is part of a bluff and they really have nothing. That might very well be the case here my friend...