Heartbroken.. He basically ignored me...

[KIDD]

So today I saw my crush at church. I was sitting down in teen ministry & he came out of no where & sat next to me. Of course my heart was racing & I got super scared. I had to say something to him & I tried to have a conversation with him. He basically didn't seem interested in talking. Everything was basically a yeah,uh huh,yep,ok. It kinda made me feel bad but I didn't take it personally.I really got the hint that he wasn't interested in talking to me. So I left him alone. He's leaving soon anyway so I need to get my mind off of him. I really thought that it was different & that he may have liked me.When church let out, I saw a female friend of mine & I started talking to her. So I was looking around & he was staring at me from a far. He wasn't smiling or anything. He just had this blank expression on his face. It made me feel really uncomfortable.So here I am, alone with no boyfriend again.Trying to figure him out is confusing & I wish I didn't fall so hard for this guy.This sucks... I never get the guy I want.

 

On another note. My friend seriously wants me to seriously find a girl & double date with him. I really don't know how I am going to get out of this. All of this is stressing... I don't want to go through the trouble of finding a girl but I can't keep shutting him down... Sigh..

[Jinx]

Well by the sounds of the situation it isn't you being a problem here. If he decided to sit beside you without invitation that is a good sign. Most of us don't sit beside someone if we're having problems with them, so therein you have a positive sign.

 

It could very well be personal problems. I know some men (women too then again) do have a lot of problems, well, expressing their problems. Even if he said he was fine he might not be. If you see him again and he seems a tad bit off center attitude wise compared to what is normal I'd ask him a question along the lines of how he is doing if he says fine, then make a comment that he isn't acting as happy as usual and you were concerned about everything being Okay. If nothing else, it seems like a simple case of concern, if he likes you, all the better that you're asking him and will most likely be perfectly fine with it.

 

I'd personally love to know what the whole stare thing is that goes on with people. My story isn't happy but the woman I was interested in that ended up being straight did that constantly where ever I was. It gets a bit awkward to say the least when they just look at you for an extended period of time. Makes me wonder if it is hidden interest despite what they say or if we're giving off vibes that just make them stand back and observe, or if both are entirely off.

[FoxLocke]

Aw Kidd, I am really sorry to hear that. I know how much you really like him, and that must be devastating. Unrequited love is a real * * * * *.

 

Believe me, I think everyone on here has been through that. I commend you for atleast trying though! You could have gone all this time wondering, "What If." But now atleast you have some closure...You know that you tried.

 

Perhaps this guy is still figuring himself out? Or there maybe the possibility that he is, indeed, straight...Well, don't worry, because you are a really good person and you'll find that guy for you.

 

Right now, I'm in limbo with the guy I'm dealing with...I haven't heard back from him in a day...but my situation is a little similar.

Just keep your hopes up, and don't get down on yourself.

[Prufrock06]

"Unrequited love is a real *****."

 

I don't know what word you had in mind to fill in those asteriks, FoxLocke, but I can think of about....oh, 10 or 20, haha.

 

I'm sorry that things didn't work out with your crush, Kid, but at least you're in good company! Crushes can be unbearable things -- I've got one right now for one of my friends (a relatively new one I made after coming out to most of my other friends) and sometimes it just pains me that he's straight (or at least, I'm pretty sure he is...) and even though we hang out all the time and he has no issues with my sexuality, I still feel like we get along so well that it kills me sometimes that there will probably never be anything more to us than just friendship.

 

That being said, you and Jinx bring up an interesting topic: interpreting other people's facial expressions/stares/mannerisms/silent treatments, etc. He did sit down next to you, which is a sign for me that if you were the person he was having an issue with, why would he have sat next to you to begin with? My thinking, based on what information you've provided: he was having a bad day, personal issues, something like that to occupy his mind so he would stare off into space or be disinterested in any kind of conversation. Sometimes I can get like that -- zone out and not be in the mood for any kind of conversation or interraction with other people while at the same time just craving their company, if that makes sense. That could be what happened in this particular instance but you won't know for sure until the next time you see him, in which I agree with Jinx that you should show some interest in how he's feeling and whether everything is ok.

 

"So here I am, alone with no boyfriend again.Trying to figure him out is confusing & I wish I didn't fall so hard for this guy.This sucks... I never get the guy I want."

 

Awww....I know how you feel. I fell hard for this friend too, and I'm still trying to pick myself up off the ground and get moving again. Things like this certainly do no wonders for our self-esteem. I'm sure you have so many good things going for you, so many good qualities that other guys out there (who are probably thinking the same thing you are about themselves) wish they could find in a boyfriend. So, cliched as it sounds but meant genuinely: Keep hope alive!

[unicornq]

Thakid, I had gone through similar situation and I understand how frustrated that was. Especially when your crush's signals are so mixed - eyeing you so much, yet not showing interest in conversation. I was in deep despair at first, but to my surprise, I'm able to overcome the bad feelings little by little. I'm now able to shake off the frustration and think of the experience as good. It tells me at least I'm brave enough to talk to her and try to understand her. Although nothing romantic happens and I'm still unrequited, somehow the chemistry between us was beautiful - that was how I tried to handle it positively.

 

Don't stress yourself too much. I hope your friend would soon give up stressing you to find a girl. Take care.

[KIDD]

Thanks ya'll. I'm still thinking about him & I know it's going to take time to fully get over him.But I must move on with my life unfortuantely. If it was meant to be it would have happen. So I think I'll just use all of my stress on getting in shape & working out. I guess guys can come later but I feel so alone without a special someone to call me & tell me how much they care about me.