Read this on Regretfulman's post "if you were dumped read this". Here's my story.

[dan_j]

It may take some time though, in most cases your ex will enjoy the new person, but guess what? Every relationship has a "honeymoon" stage, where everything is perfect and good and the person you are with seems like "the one". Well this stage doesn't last very long, and soon the grass isn't so green on the other side. This is when you have your best chance at having the ex come back to you, but you must be practicing No contact all along for it to work. People, all it takes is one fight sometimes between the ex and the new person, to send them running back to you, but never take them back right away, always wait, and don't seem eager to get back.

 

Read Regretfulman's full post. It is correct and it applied perfectly to my situation. BUT now... How long do I wait? She is still with the new guy but is telling me how she wants to get back with me and "misses what we had". I told her I can't trust or believe what she is saying when she is still with another guy. Am I mistaken saying that? She asked me if her and her bf were broken up if we could work things out. I said ya I'd want to take things slow though. We seen each other last week for the first time in 3 months... It was obvious that she still had feelings for me. Today she told me that her dad might be getting tickets to this big sporting event we both enjoy. I said "I am pretty confused? You are still dating ____ but are asking me if I want to go to this game? I later left her a msg saying I thought it would be fun no matter what and to let me know about it. Am I doing anything wrong? I felt like she was in control after I left her that msg. As though, she knows she can have me whenever she wants.

 

I used NC when I was hurt and I felt in control. Now I am showing her I still have feelings for her I feel a little out of control again. She is dating the new guy still. What do I do? I do want her back but I am scared to get played and hurt again. Is it right for me to show that I care and try to get our love back? If you have any advice or experience I'd appreciate it.

[dan_j]

Sorry about that spelling and grammar. It's 2:15 AM and it had been a long night.

[Regretfulman]

You must continue with the No Contact, trust me. Until she notifies you that she is ready to come back to you, and is done with the new guy, you must be strong and resist her. This is an important time for you, you can't mess this part up, you are almost there. Keep the NC going, or if you can't do that, only talk to her for a brief chat here and there, and tell her you have things to do. Be civil and cordial to her, but don't show too much emotion.