I am drunk tonight

[Jetta]

My son is visiting and after an experience today I totally know why he's living with his dad now. I had some wine and I nearly finished the bottle. I probably have a glass or two left of the bottle, but I am drunk. That's a lot of drinking for me. I'm fantasizing about men now. I've been packing, have some apartments to check out tomorrow. Ordered the U-haul, so I need to have something so I can move next weekend. Yes I really want out, and am really wavering on where to live. Now that I'm drunk my ex is looking so attractive. OMG desperation is setting in. He of course knows it's been a while, and he's like a dog that can totally sense when I'm in the mood. It's so bad.

 

America's Best jilted me, and I'm really pissed off about it. My son goes through glasses like water, and they didn't order my protection plan last time I was there. I metioned to the lady 3 times to put it on there. I called because I didn't see it on the receipt when I got home. Well I was assured via the phone that it was on their computer. So they flat out lied to me. I sent the company an e-mail, and I'm just really upset about it so I told them I want a refund on their eye exam thing. I sign up for 3 years of eye exams for $99, and of course said I couldn't do business with an unethical store. They could have just said we simply can't cover him, but man I'm so mad about that. The kid has serious mental issues that I just can't deal with. I'm too young and immature to be dealing with a problem child, really I am. But he's my son so I have this guilt mixed in there. God it just sucks. Then of course you get this crap added onto it. Man I'm glad he's not my main problem anymore.

 

Okay yeah I'm drunk. I'm horny and the ex is hoovering. Looks like someone is getting lucky tonight and it's not the guy I want to be sleeping with either. Oh I don't want to live alone. What will I do in times like these?

 

No this is not my normal self, just the ramblings of a drunkard.

[runner919]

i wanna say something but i will hold it to myself. im not surprised ur son lives w/ his dad. sorry if im being 2 harsh but ur drunk wen ur son is coming over that is just sad to me!

[Shadows Light]

Jetta.... I hope you pull yourself together and hold it together hun. DON"T POUNCE ON THE EX.... its not worth it.

 

Yikes... I know where you're at hun. Thats why I have instilled a rule for myself of NO DRINKING while the kids are around. which is 99% of the time. lol.

 

Can't empathize with the wanting to pounce on the X though...ugggghhh I'm repulsed by the thought...and drunk??? I'd probably spew. lol. Sorry about the graphics.. just the way it is.

 

Jetta.. you've got to write down down the PLAN and then stick to the plan. Work it. Always be thinking about plan B and C and D... and theres a whole aphlabet hun.. just work the plan. IMPROVISE.. ADDAPT and OVERCOME...

 

Hopefully you wont' be writing to tell us you've jumped in the sack with the X.. cause you'll feel sick about that in the morning for sure.

 

As far as you son is concerned. YOU ARE A MOM.... you can HANDLE just about anything he throws your way. GET YOUR BACK UP... you are his mother. There isn't ANYTHING you can't handle. And dont' give me the crap about being to young and immature..your older than he is..and more mature than he is.... so thats not an excuse. KIDS and teens can be trying.. YES.. but you do the BEST that you can do with what you got.. and then move on.

[babycristy456]

I agree... You need to pull yourself together. Stop drinking when your child or ex is around. You will make mistakes that you will regret and then cry later for think you are a bad mother and other worse things. What is it that is making your life depressed? Think of a way (or seek help) on how you can mature up and take responsibilities for the most important thing in life...motherhood. If not, what is going to happen is your own kid will resent you and that is much more painful that losing $99 to the eye doctor.

[Gunther]

Look I sympathize with your situation a good bit but this is where reality sets in, I have narrowed it down to "this":

 

"this" is what I call "square one" and this is the square, where if you're not employed you damn well get there, and if you don't have an apartment you get yourself a one bedroom and take it from there.

 

You need to be sober and you need to get your priorities straight. Remember it goes: Kid, job, self, others. Don't fool yourself into anything else.

 

If your kid is in good health, has a place to sleep, food to eat, and a school to go to, then your doing fine, then you move on.

 

If you have job and are going to it everyday, congrats, then you move on.

 

Self: If your in good health and sober, congrats, move on.

 

Then you can think about what your next best move is. Get it straight and stay straight, thats not to say you can't have a beer, but don't get drunk, look what happens when you do. *looks at ex* Thats my advice follow it and I can almost guarentee sucess in the aspects of maintaining a normal life. I hate to make it sound simple, but you have a kid this getting drunk crap can't happen. Again, I sympathize with you, but it was once said "let sympathy be your companion empathy your enemy" If I think I can help I gotta at least try to tell you.

EDIT: even if it hurts =p

[Bethany]

Your not too young or immature to deal with a problem child, your 31 for christ sake. Your child IS your problem. He's still a child and look what your life has done to him already. ...He's YOUR child and you make me ashamed as a mother and a woman to read your ramblings. Wise up, sober up and take control of your life before you end up a lush in the gutter of life.

Take to heart what the 14 year old has said to you. He's wiser than you already.

[avman]

Jetta I've followed your story for some time but now I'm going to give you some tough love. You need to enter treatment. This last incident has opened my eyes to just how serious this is. Your priorities are clearly way out of whack.

 

Getting drunk in front of your child is 100% unacceptable. Getting drunk to escape your problems solves nothing. It is simply another step on the road to addiction. You need professional help to overcome this and I think a treatment program is in order. I went back through some of your posts and you have mentioned that you are drinking often and heavily.

 

Man I'm glad he's not my main problem anymore

If this is in reference to your son then you don't even want to hear what I'm thinking right now.

 

Pick up the phone and call AA or an inpatient treatment program. Do it before you do something you really regret. Take back control of your life.