boyfriend in pain

[Bitter_Blasphemy]

my boyfriend has a serious disease called fibromyalsia. this causes him an indescribable amount of pain for which he has to take multiple drugs and even recently because of the excessive pain has had to take two months off from work per order of his doctor.

 

the problem i have with his disease is this -

i do understand that he has a ton of pain. i feel so bad for him ALL THE TIME over it. but he feels like i dont sympathize with him enough. when he calls me and wants me to give him words of encouragement i never really know what to say cause ive never been good at it. i absolutly hate this because i do feel bad about his ordeal, i just cant put it into words. can anybody help me with things i could say to make him feel better?

[phishgirl]

link removed

 

As a healthcare provider for those with chronic illnesses, I can understand your frustraion and uncertainty. All one who is ill can ask for is "support". This ultimately means this:

 

1)Validate your boyfriend's illness-assure him that it's 'real' and that he's not alone in facing fibromyalgia.

 

2) Let him know that despite his debilitating illness, that he has a very strong role in your life. Honestly, when people are sick, they wish for a sense or normalty just like anyone else. Tell him what happened at work today and request his advice. Tell him of your frustration with getting the laundry done, the dishes cleaned, etc, and let him know that his role was very valuable in these apects.

 

3) Support him and visit him frequently-avoid his consistent pain and catch up on entertainment gossip, fashion magazines you'll bore him with , or anything else that distracts you both from his pain and fatigue.

 

Point is, ultimately BE NORMAL. No one who is sick wants to be treated like a 'patient'. Let him know you love him and include him in your life until he improves.

[m4viz]

I would just take care of him if he's sick. that's the time when a person needed the love once around them. give them comfort, support, and love.

[HajiMaji]

i think phish girl has some really awesome points. I support all of them!

 

Honestly, if he is feeling insecure about you accepting him with the illness - make a letter or something for him. Buy some construction paper from walmart and some markers and put all your heart into it. Let him know how much you care for him and want to be there for him with his sickness. Mention you have a hard time saying it sometimes but you really feel it.

 

If it were me anyway, Id give you a humungo kiss for that. All anyone wants is to be loved. Im sure he would appretiate a little extra thought

 

Good luck with everything, and keep us up to date on how everything is going!!