At a loss.

[bagelgod]

Hey everybody, complete new guy here. I'm havin some serious doubts about life as a whole. I won't disclose how old I actually am, but I'm going to college at an earlier age than most, and was homeschooled for 2 years prior to college. This lead to an amazing gap in friends, one that has now caught up with me. I am down to a total of 2 friends, neither of which I consider good friends. I haven't had a love interest in 2 years, with that one being my first love interest. It did not end too well, but this isn't why I'm here. I'm here because I don't exactly like life at this point, and am lookin for a small ray of hope. I don't plan on committing suicide or anything like that, but I feel horribly depressed all the time. The constant rejection from girls, the lonliness, the lack of good friends, all of this factors into the horribility of it all. I tried to remedy the situation, but I find that at college I'm too young to fit in, and I since I don't go to highschool I can't meet people my own age. I have virtually no way to meet girls, and if I do by some miracle of god happen to meet one, she usually shoots me down. I'm not quite sure what I'm looking for here, maybe some advice. The best advice I've gotten from a friend is, "Get drunk or get high, that usually makes those feelings go away". Which is supremely stupid. I've tried the whole "enjoy life anyway" thing, but I don't know how to do that. It isn't quite working for me. Anyway, thanks for any help.

[Caldus]

1. You're young and you're changing a lot. Give it all some time and hopefully things will get better for you.

 

2. No one can be left out in college. There is something for everyone there. Do you join interest clubs there? Meet people in classes? Meet people at the cafeteria? How do you meet people there?

 

3. I am the same way by the way. Hardly any friends/social life (pretty much none actually). Just keep trying to meet people and don't let your age prevent you from doing so. Only sensible people wouldn't outcast you because of your age.

 

4. And forget about relationships for right now. The worst thing you can do is keep worrying about them. Harder said than done but you need to keep yourself a little more busy and just kick back and relax when it comes to these things. Relax.

[bagelgod]

Wow, that sure was speedy.

 

I'll have to disagre on the no one can be left out in college thing. I'd join the clubs, or hang out up there, but unfortunately I don't have a drivers license yet, and am a slave to the local bus system. Should I decide to stay 30 minutes later than usual, it usually means an additional hour wait to get home, not counting the actual driving time.

 

 

As for the meetin people my age thing, I just don't know where to go. I go to a local martial arts place, not for the reason of meeting people, but for my love of the martial arts. I tried to meet people through that, but it usually doesn't work out too well, most of them want to go hang out at bars and stay out late, whilst I am too young to drink or drive, suffice to say any combination of the two.

 

 

Hard indeed. Relationships are the only thing troubling my mind, actually. I'm confident, 100% in fact, that should by some miracle of God a girl loves me, most of my complaining would go away. I can deal with the lack of friends, but that in combination of lack of girl interest makes it a loneliness double whammy.

[Caldus]

Well where else can you meet people? Have you tried meeting people in classes or other places while you are there? I guess we'll have to agree to disagree here. But if you ever expect to get some friends or eventually find the right girl for you, you have to get out there and try.

 

As I said before, relax about the relationships. It sounds like you need to work on your confidence in general. Saying things like '...if by some miracle a girl likes me..." is self-defeating. Keep busy, get new hobbies or stick with the ones you have now, and so on. Worrying about girls all the time never gets any guy anywhere. Trust me.

[bagelgod]

Well, I'll give it a go. I'll relax on the girl thing for now, and try to meet new people. School starts on the 22nd, so wish me good luck.

[Caldus]

Good luck.

[pandorasbox]

this sounds like a job for superman! just kidding.

 

Bro, i feel ya pain! But trust me man, in a few days you'll make some friends anyway.. and as for the girls loving thing.. dude, out of any 100 random girls, only about 20 or so are the kind you want to hook up with anyway. The rest are mostly psycho / in a relationship / lesbians etc. You get the picture.

 

Just don't don't clingy around girls.. take things 1 step at a time, Step 1, get the phone number, step 2: go on a date, step 3: go to her place or invite her to yours, step 4: get laid! (step 5 comes ONLY if you have been FRIENDS her for at least 6 months and still want to get in a relationship with her), step 5: ask her out or whatever!

 

I won't say 'Hope that helped' because i know it did!