Mediation. Does it work???

[zkor-man]

I just learned that my STBX is considering "mediation" as oppose to going to court and a nasty,expensive divorce. Has anyone reading this, gone trough such process?? Does it work??? Please advice. Thanks!!

[melrich]

Yes mediation is by far the preferred route to going to court. The basic philosophy is different. Court proceedings mean you take adversarial positions. Mediation is about working together to get a result through compromise.

 

Mediation works and the latest figures I have seen (in Oz) is that 95% of property settlements are resolved through mediation.

 

definitely preferable (unless you have a dangerous/abusive ex spouse)

[QTpie87]

whoa, oK um this will sound dumb. but what is the difference? I have no clue what you guys are talking about and well I wont be able to stop thinking about that word until I know what it means.

(mediation) that one.

[avman]

How it works depends on where you live. Here where I am you are actually required to attempt mediation or arbitration prior to coming to court. Judges don't really want to have to deal with dividing up all the little stuff so they'd much prefer you work it out between yourselves.

 

Mediation typically works like this. You arrange an appointment with a mediator. Both of you are assigned to separate conference room. The mediator then goes back and forth between you both attempting to resolve the issues. As long as progress is being made, the mediation continues. If an impasse is reached, then you'll have to settle it in court. Either party can stop the mediation at any time.

 

If you reach agreement on your issues, the mediator will send it to the court for approval. Its much less painful and less expensive than a long drawn out court battle.

[QTpie87]

so that's what it means huh. phew, don't have to think about it anymore.

 

Well now I can help sense I know what it means. I would definetly do the mediation. why spend all the time in court when You could possibly work it all out just between the two of you? And if you don't like it then you could go to court. So either way it's win win, cause if you do like it then great, if you don't you can change it.

good luck with all of it.

Qtpie87

[zkor-man]

Thanks for your answers (advice)...Wish us well...

[annie24]

Good luck!

[vinciheart]

I see this is an older thread, but my question is mediation specific.

 

What is the best way to find a mediator? Any questions I need to ask them other than how much they charge, to see if they're a good choice? I can't ask friends for recommendations, because I don't know anyone in my area that used one.