do the dumpees repeat their mistakes

[saltnpepper]

I was pondering............. do the dumpees repeat the same mistakes they did with their first failed relationship. Even though they realize their mistakes, and get dumped again in a new relationship. Is it a deadly cycle one is caught in.

 

Just because once u get into a new relationship, everything feels so wonderful that one tends to forget the cardinal rules learned from earlier mistakes!!!!!!!

 

How many here have been dumbed more than twice by different person?

If the answer is yes, it seems scary

[Sn0man]

Well, your post is a little ambiguous, but if you're asking how many of us have been dumped more than once, my hand is up. I will always stay in a relationship and try to work out the problems while the significant other will leave. My curse I guess...I can only think of one person I have had to break up with, but that was because she was a crazy stalker/drunk. As for learning lessons, I learn a new one with each relationship. Many of us repeat our mistakes because often those things that are considered mistakes are a part of who we are.

[brando]

I dont believe it matters if your the dumper or dumpee. Sometimes it may take a second go around to learn the lessons we thoght we originally learned. Sometimes we didnt necessarily learn them.

 

I was told and am a firm believer, if their is a lesson to be learned, it will be. Regardless with who one is with. New relationship current, etc...

[rainy soul]

Its hard to say,

I have been dumped in every long term relationship I have had and I have also been the one to initially bring up the possibility of breaking up and then within a couple of months whammo! On the other hand every short term non serious ie 1 or 2months not living together no plans for the future I have been the one that has ended it. It can go both ways but I have noticed a pattern in my life.

I think we can learn but the key word is can! Like you mentioned its easy to get wrapped up in a new love and if your like me believe its finally the true love especially when they put a ring on your finger (like my ex) and although there were many moments were I thought or talked about breaking up because I felt like wallpaper in our relationship I didn't.

Who knows but being aware of a potential pattern or problem is the first step to changing it...right? This is the first time I've REALLY identified my own tendencies in relationships so who knows maybe I'll be the one breaking hearts the next time...god it must be nice in comparision to what we are going through!?