Running away...

[Alex_1]

Hello. I have this little problem that has been plagueing me for a while now. I thought that I had conquered it... but I was wrong. Just what that problem is, let me tell you...

 

I have always been afraid to get close to someone. In fact I personally find it terrifying. The ironic thing is, I really want to be close to someone. I tried to stay away from men that I knew liked me, and thereforeeeeee put them off the chase. But everyonce in a while, I would be determined to overcome this fear, and I would say yes to date. But even then, I would break it off after the first or second date.

 

Well, I thought that I had conquered this when I started to see this one guy... he's great, and very patient. We have been seeing each other for almost five months now.

 

During this time, we haven't exactly done anything heavy when it comes to the physical aspect of the relationship. Mostly just making out and stuff. Well, we have started to talk about having sex. And, well, I am a virgin. And that old familiar feeling is coming back ten fold. The things that I found endearing in the beginning, I am latching onto now and making them into something ugly. So much so that I find myself wondering why I even liked him. But I know that this isn't true. Then there are times when I cannot wait to experiance making love for the first time. I am jumping back and forth doing this. What scares me, is that the doubting and fear are overtaking any of the good things.

 

I don't know what to do. I just think how easy it would be to just step out of the relationship. And then all my worries would be put to rest.

 

A little advice?

[AN]

Do what makes you happy. If you want to experience sex for the first time, I'm pretty sure the guy won't say "Oh lets wait, I don't think I'm ready." You should stick around for awhile and if things get even uglier then get out of that relationship.

[Heretic]

Sex is more about trust then pleasure your first time. You're going to need someone to take it VERY slow. It'll be worth it in the end. It'll just take a few times for you to umm... relax. Don't be afraid of it though, it's a beautiful thing that you should share with someone.

 

If you don't think this is the right guy, don't. You've only been together for 5 months he shouldn't pressure you.

 

Just think about it and make the right choice. Can you trust this guy to retain control? Is this something you want to give to him and only him? Will you regret giving it to him if he break up with you the next day?

 

These are important questions. I'm not trying to put more doubt in your head I'm just trying to show you the way I'd look at it. If you feel good about it go for it and don't look back.