POTENTIAL GIRLFRIEND FALLING INTO THE FRIEND ZONE

[mick8888]

Okay here's what happened: I met this girl "online" at a very popular social networking site (link removed). She lives in the same town as me, and is approximately the same age (early 30's). Neither one of us was on the site with the express purpose of dating or "hooking up" or anything like that. I messaged her because she likes some of the same bands I like and we just started swapping messages in mid-December, and then instant messaging, and then as of about 2.5 weeks ago, talking on the phone. We started talking on the phone a lot, almost every day, and then this past Wednesday we met up for coffee and hung out for a couple hours, had good conversation and lots of laughs. And then tonight she came over and hung out at my apartment for a few hours and played with my dog and we watched a movie and ate chicken wings. But here's the thing -- even though she came over, since meeting me on Wednesday she hasn't really gone out of her way to call or message me like she had before we met, which leads me to believe that when we did meet she didn't really find me attractive or anything. Now, I realize that we didn't meet up as any kind of "date" really, but I think that if she was interested in me in that way that she would have probably shown more interest. I mean, she did come over and hang out, but I didn't get the sense that she was interested in anything more than a friendship. That's not to say that I pushed it or even brought anything like that up, but I definitely definitely find her extremely attractive and am possibly interested in more than a friendship. But don't get me wrong -- if we are just friends it's cool because I really like her as a person, but am I in a situation already where it's completely fallen into the friends zone and is unlikely to be relationship potential? I don't want to push things and alienate her if she's not interested in me in that way, so is the best course of action just to keep hanging out with her as friends?

[dontknowwhattodo]

I would say keep hanging out with her and once in a while "tell" her that you are interested. Don't let her guess what you are thinking, you have to tell her. And don't over-do too, that is not good. She may not feel "that" attracted to you but this can develop over time if you guys have a good time hanging out and like each other company.

 

For me as a woman, sometimes it takes time to feel attracted to someone, it usually happens to me when I hang out with someone for a while. But yes, sometimes I feel that attraction right away. It all depends. Relax and keep going. Good luck.