I am attracted to my best friend HELP!!!!!! Please reply

[jlentsch]

I don't know what to do, i have been friend with this girl for 2 1/2 years now. She means everything to me. I have kind of had a crush on her for years but now it is like i love her. I had talked to my other friend about it a couple of months back and he went and told her. I really did not want him to. That made things really akward for a while because i was still trying to figure out whether i was going to tell her and just try to keep the friendship as is or tell her and try for an intimate relationship.

 

I don't know if she is attracted to me. I am now at the point where i want to turn into something more. BUt i don't think she wants to be anything but friends with me. I talked to her and she said "it would be too weird". I think of it as we already know eachother like the back of our hands. and people always say the best relationships start with great friends ships.

 

She has an 18 month old daugter that i am deeply in love with as well every chance i get i hold her and watch her so heather can get out for a couple hours.

 

May I note that i am a very shy and insecure person and do not have much dating or relationship experience

WHAT SHOULD I DO????

 

please write back

[Babes]

I have dated 3 of my Best friends of 1-2 years of Friendship. It is wonderful because you already know each other and what the other one needs. But what sucks is sometimes things arent exciting like new relationships are. I want to warn you though that if you do start dating her you have a chance of losing her all together because sometimes its just to hard to go back being friends after you have been more. So think about that. How much does this friendship mean to you? I just hope if you do hook up that you two will stay together forever

[jlentsch]

I don't want to lose my best friend. But i cannot just bury the feeling i have. That just hurts too much. I still think she would say no to me. She has never thought that people should be friends first. along time ago one of her other friends asker out and she said "I don't Date my friends, that would be to weird, we are just friends.

 

what should i do?

[lauralied]

Hi!

 

I completely understand how you feel. It has been a slow process over 5 or so years, but I too have fallen in love with my best male friend. We met in high school and have been like two peas in a pod since. I attend a university, he is in the ARMY. We talk nearly daily. The negative report: A year or so ago I finally told him how I felt for him, but he did not have the same romantic feelings. In fact, he told me our relationship had progressed to an almost familial one, and that he loved me like a sister. We are closer than ever now, and I admit that I still believe (stubbornly, and perhaps stupidly) a part of him knows exactly how I feel. I guess I hold out hope that once he matures and realizes what a real and fulfilling relationship should be, he will see what I have seen in us all along. If this girl is truly your best friend, she will at least treat your disclosure in a gentle and sensitive manner. She may not share your feelings, but someday she might realize how perfect you guys could be together. But remember that sometimes finding out the cold hard reality is worse than being unsure or not knowing exactly where things stand. It took many months for me to get over the crushing realization that my dream for us was not to be. I think Radiohead put it well with the line, "Just because you feel it doesn't mean its there." Good luck.

 

Laura

[Charlie]

My best male friend of almost 3 years and I have finally started dating 2 months ago. At first it was a little awkward but that feeling past after a couple of weeks. Now its the best thing that has happened to me. I encourage you to give it a go. I was always rejecting him before by saying it would be weird or it would ruin the friendship. When I finally gave it a go it proved me wrong. Take a chance.

[Pengui6668]

I've loved my best female friend for about 4 years now.... We never got together, but we always have had feelings for each other... I love her to death and i know she feels the same, but we just on't do anything.... It took me forever to tell her tooo... told her a few months ago she's perfect, everything i could look for n a girl etc.. and i told her i love her. i figured she'd be freaked out completely and never wanna talk to me again.. she was fine with it.. almost like she knew what i was gonna tell her... we're still best friends even though nothing's happened... she's still not over her most recent boyfriend and i wanna give her time... When she's ready i think we're gonna go out and live the life we should have started many years ago...

 

don't make my mistake... let her know.... and if things do happen don't be a moron and screw it up..

[Cid]

the hard thing is if you go for her you have a chance to louse to all but you all so have a chance of gaining it all just use your best judgement.