It happened again with my superior

[wondering731]

I'm in a position where I can't leave my job for another year approximately, and am stuck with a superior who was a close friend when we didn't work together. I messed up badly and she stopped responding or talking on a personal level (posted too many times about this and am trying to be brief).

 

We had a work party and everyone was drinking. At the end when almost everyone was gone she came up to me and started joking with me like old times. She also held my arm for a while and was trying to squeeze my muscles. This was similiar to what happened at her bday party (even though she didn't talk to me for most of the night).

 

Tomorrow I have to see her and I know I will be walking into the same situation where it will be like nothing happened and nothing has changed. I honestly feel like quitting now and finding a job at a 30% salary cut. I have never been affected like this by any girl in my life and I don't know what to do. My friend who's my main boss is.giving me a great opportunity and I feel like I'd be letting him down and crushing a better future for myself by leaving.

[Slyness]

Wait, so your going to leave your job over some women. Man up bro. Get that sand out of your vagina, be confident, witty and be yourself. You acted needy in the past, I get it. Did you forget to mention that you and her got together last night. If not, go about your life and your career.

[wondering731]

I know. Never felt this way for any relationship I was in let alone a friendship. She motivated me in certain ways. I don't really know why this has gotten to me. It was more of me being a jerk to her. She always reiterated that I'm her brother but it was difficult for me to date anyone while we were friends. Now she has disowned me and she's my superior at work now anyways so there's nothing to even talk about. Thanks though