Taven Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Just wanted advice from those of you here that have lost a good guy or girl, simply due to the stars not alligning and no real negative reasoning. I just lost someone very special because he didn't feel he could love me, and had extra work commitments. It was very difficult, at one point my ramblings about never feeling this much hurt or pain made him cry at his work desk, he said he hates that this has hurt me so much. All my other heartbrake has come from men treating me badly, (they usually leave me for another guy) and so I have that confusion, anger, negativity and the "I can do a lot better" sentiment going on. But all I have is this hole inside me, I don't feel like I will find better, because he was wonderful and everything I wanted. So how the heck am I gonna get over this?! Any success stories from people who went through something similar? Did you get over them? Did the pain dissappear and the memories brought only happy smiles to your face? I need some assurance Link to comment
Rainbow1 Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Sorry to hear about these experiences, it is sometimes crazy thinking how some people just fall in love early on, have a wholesome relationship make it work at don't experience all of this heartache. And then on the other hand some people, (myself included- SO FAR), just have to face all of these ups and downs in relationships due to the way things go, just cause of fate and there's nothing you can do about it. You just need to have faith in what's to come in the future and don't give up. This is what we are inclined to do when we feel we've lost something or someone great- we want to resort to giving up. And maybe you can't help yourself from doing that for a while. It's hard to train yourself not to idealise your previous partner/relationship. But ultimately you have to trust what's to come and trust that something great will come along that you didn't expect, and probably when you least expect it as well- and all of a sudden you will realise why it didn't work out with anyone else! Please don't give up! You are stronger than you think. Link to comment
Taven Posted October 22, 2014 Author Share Posted October 22, 2014 Thank you Rainbow. I have been through a lot of crappy men (and now one good one) I think I really deserve a shot at happiness I feel like I've been at this for decades but I'm only 26. I hope one day I get that butterflies feeling again, and I hope it is for a decent man that can love me. I want that more than anything in the universe (other than him right now). I'm glad you feel like this, it must be helping you a lot with your healing. Link to comment
Rainbow1 Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 It's a tough stage in the early stages of the break-up. Sounds like you're going through the intense early stages of feeling the withdrawal - and it's so hard bc it's like having to give up a drug that is the most addictive of any! I am finding it so hard right now as well and am feeling a bit confused. You never know what will happen though. I'm 25 as well so it hasn't been decades for me either but I feel the same way and am also fed up with it! Link to comment
Clinton Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 25 and 26. You're both way too young to be wondering if you'll find true love. You have your entire lives in front of you. Don't get down. It just takes time to find a real match sometimes. Wading through the dating swamp is a drag sometimes but it is worth it when you finally find someone who cares about you as much.as you care about them. Link to comment
Taven Posted October 22, 2014 Author Share Posted October 22, 2014 25 and 26. You're both way too young to be wondering if you'll find true love. You have your entire lives in front of you. Don't get down. It just takes time to find a real match sometimes. Wading through the dating swamp is a drag sometimes but it is worth it when you finally find someone who cares about you as much.as you care about them. I'm tired of all the heartache tho I know it's still raw but part of me wants to end it all, I can't even think about him as the loss is so painful. Link to comment
Clinton Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 I can absolutely promise you there are better times ahead. I lost what I thought was the love of my life after a 13 year relationship. I was crushed. Yet here I am years later happier than I've ever been. We all go through heartache, but we don't let it define us. There are better days ahead, you just have to go through some bad times to get there. Link to comment
Taven Posted October 22, 2014 Author Share Posted October 22, 2014 I can absolutely promise you there are better times ahead. I lost what I thought was the love of my life after a 13 year relationship. I was crushed. Yet here I am years later happier than I've ever been. We all go through heartache, but we don't let it define us. There are better days ahead, you just have to go through some bad times to get there. Thank you, I am on a real rollercoast of emotion at the moment. When I think about him tho I start crashing. I'm glad you're happy again, I like a success story. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.