Is this my fault???

[gutted]

Im just looking back in hindsight you can read my first post to see the whole story anyway here is the thing, My 'boyf' well ex, he moved out of house he shared with his baby mother and into mine, this is after a very long messy relationship where he has lied to both me and his baby mother, repeatedly, but this time he told me their house was up for sale so I decided ok Ill give it a go, It was fine he never offered to pay me anything after a couple of weeks out of curiosity I asked who the estate agent was, to which he replyed he didnt know, so I said it was impossible no to know he said 'oh yeah its for private sale'??? this sent alarm bells off, was he lying again? anyway when he had to babysit he told me he had to stay up there? why? I obviously went on one. Twice he stayed at their house, the third time He decided to come back that night but while I was on the phone he said 'its like having 2 cazy women in my life........ with all the lying etc before and the uncertainty I lost it I asked him to leave so he went back to his house, I tried to call him to sort it out he had no time etc, he did manage to arrive very late one night just time to have sex and go again, I waited around for 3 weeks still he couldnt make time, so I called him last week and asked about the house he advised me they had taken it off the market he obviously knew this when he came to my house previously to have sex, I couldnt help it I turned into a real physco, he had told me once that she knew about me and him and they had split up thats how I got involved previosly but he hadnt told her anything, this time I threatened to go up there and tell her everything, (I wouldnt do that mainly because of her and their son she doesnt deserve that), In the end I said if he ever comes anywhere near me or calls me again then thats what Ill do. I guess what im trying to find out is did I ruin it this time by asking him to leave????

[Joanne85]

It seems to me that he ruined it long before you started to. I don't blame you for what you said to him. Everyone speaks out of anger sometimes, IM sure you felt like you had been betrayed and lied to enough. So if he wants to live his life the way he is, then let him but you don't have to be a part of it. In the end the only person going to be hurting would be you, so let it go and move on with your life. You will find an honest, nice guy out there. He don't seem like he is worth the time anyway. No, the baby mother does not deserve it but neither do you, and she should have the right to know what's going on behind her back, not out of anger or jealousy or pay back, but I would tell her woman to woman what has really been happening and all the lies he has told you both. I wish you the best of luck with this situation and hope everything works out, but Hun I would not worry about if you ruined it, cause you cant base a relationship on lies and betrayal. Let him go and move on, easier said then done I know but you went threw all this, so you can do it. Wish you the best of luck!!!!