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When do I tell him I'm not interested?

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Ok. I work with this guy, and he and I have been talking, mostly at staff outings, and staff parties. We have a lot in common, and see eye to eye on a lot of issues.


Last weekend we went to see a movie that we were both looking forward to seeing. I didn't see it as a date. But he did. And I have never had any thoughts of him romantically.


At the end of the date/not-a-date he surprised me with a kiss. (That's how I finally clued in)


Now, I know that I should tell him my true feelings. But I don't know when is the proper time. We had made plans earlier to get together. And now I don't know if I should honor that commitment. Or if i should go and then tell him. If I do go, do I tell him at the beginning, middle, or end of the outing.


I know that I don't feel anything toward him, romantically. But even if I did now wouldn't be a good time at all. He just divorced a few months ago, so he's on the rebound. I'm not sure how I should go about doing this. Any advise?

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Hello silvanesti


I think you just need to be honest with him and tell him that your not interested in him that way. In my opinion going out with him on more "dates" and not letting him know that (to you) they're just friendly outings, is a little misleading. So just be honest, I know it hard but this can spare a lot of hurt feelings in the future. Good luck. 8)

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I know that I have to tell him the truth. And misleading him is the last thing that i want. But what I am at a loss is how and when.


When is the proper time to tell him? Do I tell him at the beginning, when i see him next. Or during and outing. Or at the end of one.

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