Haunted...

[Elektra22]

Sorry if this is a stupid thread to start, but I'm just completely messed up ... I have heard "our song" three freaking times today and the last time I heard it was when he was singing it to me almost a year ago while we were still together. Up until last month I was feeling better FINALLY about the break up, moving on, trying to immerse myself in positive projects and just live my life. Then BAM out of the blue he contacts me after 9 months of pure no contact on both sides, messes my head up offering to "be friends" and making sure to reiterate in every email he writes how much he "misses me." I decided not to even respond to his last correspondence (which was a week and 1/2 ago) since I came to the conclusion this was unhealthy for me, was doing nothing but reopening all my old wounds, and impeding my healing process. Now today, out of the blue, from 3 different sources I hear "our song" and it's like someone just ripped my heart wide open. I don't even know why this should still affect me so, but this, in addition with him recently breaking almost a year of no contact, has just thrown me. I'm not taking this as a sign we're getting back together- I gave up on that long ago and this notion was reinforced by his lame friendship proposal coupled with random hit and miss emails. I just feel like the ghost of our past relationship is somehow being resurrected today and I feel haunted...

[force]

Songs can do that. You hear "the" song and you think about that person the rest of the day. It's having even more affect on you because he is trying to get in touch right now. I think your doing the right thing by not responding. If he wants you back nothing will stop him. Saying he misses you is just trying to bait you, then once your baited he'll be like "okay she still wants me, NEXT." If you ever do decide to reply wait a couple weeks, then disappear again for a month, it'll drive him crazy and he'll want you like never before. Lol

[Elektra22]

Thanks for replying Force that is mighty great advice love it LOL!

[rocknrolla]

Hey Elektra,

 

I hear ya, I went to the drive in a week or so ago and while I was at the food stand I literally saw me and my ex like two ghosts standing at the counter laughing while we waited for or food from the last time we were there together. It was terrible.

 

It's unfair how such things taunt us (the broken hearted) while they (the heart breakers) get to go on with life almost as if we or the times spent together never existed.

 

I know there's no real advice there but thought I'd comment anyhow.

[Elektra22]

Hi Rock,

Awww that really sounds awful It is so hard to let go of something you wanted and believed in with all of your heart and it becomes all the more difficult when you face such a powerful reminder of them. I still cannot believe I found the strength to stop replying to his breadcrumbs, but I did and someday you will find the power within you to let go of all the pain and heartache that has been tormenting you so. Thanks for commenting I always appreciate it!

[Watergirl777]

Elektra, my beautiful. Please don't be upset. That's why I don't listen to music or do anything that reminds me of him. Even driving the same roads hurts. Try not to re read emails or anything that reminds you of your time together. Thinking of you and sending you my best, warmest, hugest hugs xxx

[Elektra22]

Thanks Watergirl you are such a doll. I was truly upset then but I am happy to report that I'm having much better days now and I'm looking forward to going back to school this fall. I finally have pushed thru the hurt stage and am in the numb one whereby if I hear our song or something reminds me of him instead of neverending waves of pain all my senses just kind of tune out. I guess that's a move in the right direction. I am sorry your ex is still causing you such turmoil I hope soon you can go about your days & nights with peace and find a man who is truly worthy of such a gem as you!