he wants the baby I think it will be devastating!

[kamurj]

I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. We have 5 children between us; his oldest daughter, my older 3, from previous marriages, and the youngest girl is ours togther. Even though I was taking birth control I just found out I am pregnant again. I cannot bear the thought of having another child right now. We have been fighting alot as it is, the financial burdens, and the fact I am only 23 with 4 kids already and I also work make this so scary! If anyone could help me find a way to tell my partner I cannot go through with this pregnancy I would appreciate it so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[kamurj]

On 2002-01-30 10 Anonymous wrote:

I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. We have 5 children between us; his oldest daughter, my older 3, from previous marriages, and the youngest girl is ours togther. Even though I was taking birth control I just found out I am pregnant again. I cannot bear the thought of having another child right now. We have been fighting alot as it is, the financial burdens, and the fact I am only 23 with 4 kids already and I also work make this so scary! If anyone could help me find a way to tell my partner I cannot go through with this pregnancy I would appreciate it so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Anonymous,

I have no answers but just wanted to write to tell you how very very sad I feel for you. I know how the burdens of life can be so overwhelming at times. Surely at the very least you can tell him that you feel completely overwhemed by this situation -- is there any comfort or help he can give? You sound as if you need some heavy duty mothering yourself (is there no one to give you a little more relief?). I'm a mother myself, but only had one, but it was with an uncaring and cruel man, who I eventually left - I lost my own mother when I was a teenager, so I know how important Moms are - if you don't have a Mom to turn to, I feel so sad for you - if you do: where is she? She should be hugging and holding you, and advising you. I send you my love, even though I don't know you.

[maid marian]

I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. We have 5 children between us; his oldest daughter, my older 3, from previous marriages, and the youngest girl is ours togther. Even though I was taking birth control I just found out I am pregnant again. I cannot bear the thought of having another child right now. We have been fighting alot as it is, the financial burdens, and the fact I am only 23 with 4 kids already and I also work make this so scary! If anyone could help me find a way to tell my partner I cannot go through with this pregnancy I would appreciate it so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I can feel your frustrations and am very sympathetic to your plight. I myself, am a 25 year old mother of two. I have felt the pangs of not knowing what to do in a pregnancy scare. Finances are a very huge factor, but not the only one relavent. While I am not a Pro Life activist, I do ultimately believe that your unborn baby should also have a say so in whether or not they survive. I know it is very difficult, but I know you can do it. It sounds like you already do so much and your dedication and ambitious drive can get you through anything. I've always heard that when life is all said and done, it is the things you didn't do that you regret. Not the things you did. Bringing another child into your home could be the biggest joy you ever experience. You'll never know if you don't go through with it.

I tell you this because I know the haunting pain that ending a pregnancy causes. I would much rather feel the love that another child ultimately brings than to feel the horrible guilt and regret that comes from taking the life of a child who never had a voice.

I respect your decision, I am only offering my opinion and seemingly sound advice to hopefully help you through your difficult feelings at this time.

 

With all my sincerety and best wishes.

[Patti]

I can only add that I have a dear friend who had an abortion. It haunts her to this day. If you must do anything ....how about adoption? Are you aware of all the parents unable to have a child?