B-Day = D-Day?

[JohnnyTable]

Just curious.

 

I have been broken up with my ex for about 2 months now with about 5 weeks of NC from her (I called once but did not get a call back).

 

However my birthday is coming up. This will be an interesting turning point as she will have to make a decision. Call or not call? e-card or no e-card? Of course this assumes that she actually remembers.

 

Either way it will send a signal:

 

-She does not care about me

-She cares about me

-She is trying to manipulate me and has an excuse to

 

Of course in knowing which of the above is going on-there is no way to tell. So I just can't care!

 

If she doesn't contact me, I am free to never contact her on a future holiday or birthday since this is the first one to come up since our split thus setting the precedent. Right?

 

Is it common to get contact on a b-day?

[sunfirechick]

I don't know if it's common, but you're right, if she doesn't contact you, it does say a whole lot. I think it's to be expected, though, just out of respect.

[k33]

I didn't get contacted on my birthday and it sucked, sucked so bad. I felt horrible about it. I called him 3 days later and he said "he forgot." Whatever. It hurt, it still hurts.

 

The only advice I can give you from someone who has been there, is don't expect to hear from her, cause if you do you could be disapponted, if you don't any contact will be a pleasant surprise.

 

I hope she is a better person than my husband.

[JohnnyTable]

Just to be clear. Are you saying that contact IS to be expected or IS NOT to be expected out of respect?

 

I'd almost say that not contacting me is the most respectful.

[maria219]

Good question...my bday is tomorrow and I am wondering if my ex will make any effort to wish me a happy birthday or not...either way I won't take it to heart...but just wondering what it would mean if he did or didn't....(so yeah basically the same question as above..)

[JohnnyTable]

Maria,

 

We share the same birthday! So happy birthday from me at least

[maria219]

Johnny, lol thanks. I wish you a great birthday also...we rock

[k33]

I'd say contacting you is more respectful... at least a little email happy birthday. I still do that for my ex-husband of almost 4 years... nothing big, means nothing, I feel nothing for him, but it is just a nice thing to do...

 

My current (separated) husband didn't and it pissed me right off. I think it's rude not to say happy birthday to anyone if you know the date... But I am a total birthday princess.

 

Happy birthday to you both!

[Mjane]

So great question.

My X's b-day is Saturday. I bought him a card but am undecided if I should send it. We broke up three weeks ago and haven't talked since. I sent him a letter the day after and he called me two days later to say he got the letter and would talk to me later. I returned the phone call but have not heard from him.

I'm afraid that if I send him the letter he'll just call me to say thanks. I only want him to call me if he wants to get back together.

So, I'm torn about sending the card or not.

I think it's respectful not to send you a card on your bday if he worries he's giving you false hope.

I wouldn't expect her to get in touch.

[JohnnyTable]

She did not contact me in any way for my birthday.

 

On one hand it hurt because there is the possibility that she just didn't care enough to even send an e-mail.

 

On the other hand it is a relief because I don't have to decide what to do in response or how to handle her birthday which comes up in a few months.