Survey:Ex becoming friends?

[VultureFury]

What is the possibility of an ex becoming friends or even close/best friends? do ex's avoid being (close) friends cause of the chances of gettin back together? Is the only sure way of being close friends with a girl is not to enter in a relationship?

[Jsphsl4204]

It's a big probablillty that you will... I'm good friends with all of my old girlfriend's and ex's... And naw, they don't avoid being friends because the chances of getting back together... And no, the only sure way of being close friends with a girl is to no enter a relationship... Just my input...

[Michael2]

I will probably get flamed for this comment.

 

If you can be friends with your ex, did you ever truly love them on an intimate level?

 

I dont think true lovers can ever be friends once the relationship ends. Its just too damn hard. One person will have feelings, and the other may not. There lies the problem.

 

Once you break things off with a lover, you are better off cutting your losses and moving on.

[The Enigmatical Mr X]

I remain good friends with one of my ex's. The others didn't work out so well. Do you want to be friends? The only way it ever works is if neither of you want to get back together. Maybe at a later date it all rekindles, but that's another story.

 

The occurrences however, of an ex-friendship are rare.

[VultureFury]

Im tryin to become a friend but its very difficult for me. But i dont think i could only be her friend cause of these feels i still have, and their very strong too. when i think of her my heart races and sometimes i get dizzy.... im still not really sure what she thinks but then again thats another story...

[edgecrusher96]

Ok, I might get flamed for this but everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

 

I try to remain at least on good terms with all my exes. There was something I found in them that made me want to date them in the first place, and just because we weren't meant to be lifelong partners, doesn't mean that we have to hate each other. If the relationship was abusive, then understandably you wouldn't want to be friends with the person though.

 

I have some semblance of friendship with my exes, though more distantly than before we went out. I know that I can never be as close to them as we used to but to me it's better than nothing. I never end a relationship because I have another person lined up, so I don't make friends with exes as a form of backup. In fact, I would be supportive of new partners and be happy for my exes if they found someone who makes a more compatible partner than me.

 

This is the way I see it... I know that once you break up then you need to spend a significant amount of time away from each other, to let the person get on with their life, then I like to start building a friendship later. To me, their willingness to stay friends or at least on good terms indicates whether or not they liked me as a person in the first place, or if they were just physically addicted to me (lust). If they claim to care about me so much during the relationship, then after the relationship, couldn't care less if they accidentally ran me over with their car (to use an example), then I think it's quite spiteful of them and it proves that they didn't really like me as a person, but just used me to get their emotional and/or physical needs met, only to refuse having anything to do with me when I no longer meet their needs.

 

But then again, I've only had 2 short relationships of no more than 3-4 months, so maybe it's easier for me to stay friends.

[Michael2]

Edgecrusher answer that question when you date some longer then 1 year.

[edgecrusher96]

In the case where you've been dating over a year I'd imagine it'll be much harder to stay friends... but not impossible. I think that the longer you've been going out with the person, the less likely you'll be friends after the relationship ends.

 

I've always been friends before a relationship, so to me it's worth restoring a friendship. But if you and your partner have never been anything other than a relationship then there is probably little point in building a friendship after a relationship.

 

I like to be friends with exes provided that circumstances permit it, but I suppose it's not for everyone's personality. I'm a quite forgiving and laid back sort of person, and I don't really dwell in the past, so maybe that kind of mentality helps in staying on good terms, along with the fact that my relationships have been fairly short, so there wasn't enough time to build up too much resentment. But everyone's relationship and circumstances are different, so there is no one size fits all answer to the staying friends issue.

[guy40az]

The Enigmatical Mr X is right you can only do it if neither of you want to get back together.

 

And it is always the one that does the breaking up that sugest the friend thing..