deadroo Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 Hi all You may read previous posts to catchup on my situation but i still need advice/help.... Im still totally in love and wrapped up with my ex... its sooo painful, i have a few days of things going well for me then BOOOM a night of no sleep and when i do constant dreaming about her... alot of sex dreams with her. i feel im going insane, we 'speak' via text about our kids, pickups, drop offs etc but nothing else... i want to fix it all but i cant do anything... ive been really good with no contact but last few days ive sent her messages saying i miss her as my friend and someone to talk bout life with... i even did a really corny thing to day 'todays crossword five accross empty space 4letters'... she hasnt yet replied... maybe its just game over totally but i dont feel that in my deep feelings... time... time ... time.... the other problem is i dont have time as only have a 6month visa for the country and have 4.5 months left.... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ive got myself together, stopped smoking, cleaned self up, sorted some of my own issues, dress better, doing sports... but im still missing my best friend in my life... her..>! Sigh thanks for reading x Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 2, 2011 Author Share Posted November 2, 2011 >????????????? any help? sigh Link to comment
shortest_straw90 Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 Im the same mate, every night is the same, Ill go to bed feeling ok and then wake up missing her because Ive been dreaming about her. Theirs not much you can do but not let it get to you really. I mean I shouldnt miss her or give a crap about her after everything she's done to me but I cant help the way I feel. The only way this is going to go away is by moving on with your life and forgetting all about her, well thats my plan anyway. I know one day Ill be able to dream about somebody else who deserves to be dreamt about. But until then my mind is consumed with thoughts of her. Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 2, 2011 Author Share Posted November 2, 2011 its totally consuming... im getting so tired with it. im having a weak day and text her and phoned... said i had a hole in my life... (grrr weak!) im normally pritty good but today i just want to talk and share life like we always have done. time time time... but i want her back, i want my family back. its becoming soo painful. Link to comment
shortest_straw90 Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 its totally consuming... im getting so tired with it. im having a weak day and text her and phoned... said i had a hole in my life... (grrr weak!) im normally pritty good but today i just want to talk and share life like we always have done. time time time... but i want her back, i want my family back. its becoming soo painful. Texting her will only make it harder for you, if your texting her your just going to keep reminding yourself about the situation your in. The only time you should get in touch with her is when it concerns the children, anything else will just make you feel the way your feeling now. Ive been NC for two days now and I miss her so much but I know in the long run this will help me. Dont torture yourself by texting her and dragging out what is already a very painful thing to go through. I did that for three weeks and now I just want to forget about her. I understand what your going through though mate and I feel for you. Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 2, 2011 Author Share Posted November 2, 2011 thanks for words brother. i will try. just when you want something its hard not to reach for it. Link to comment
shortest_straw90 Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 thanks for words brother. i will try. just when you want something its hard not to reach for it. No problem, its very difficult but we'll all get through these bad times, we'll learn from them and in the end they'll only make us stronger. Keep posting on here whenever your feeling down and we'll all try and give you words of support, advice and experiences. The way I see it is were all in the same boat so we should all be here for each other during these difficult times. Link to comment
AngelAmber Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 Iv been in the same place you guys, the only way i stopped obsessing and picked up the pieces was to focus on my life, self imporvement etc. but also- i had to train my mind to stop thinking about my ex. everytime my mind wandered or i started thinking about him, i told myself to stop that thought in its tracks, and forced myself to think about something else. i had to do that many times before it worked, but it worked a little more each time, i could last a little longer in the 'other"thought and eventually u get to the point where u realize u just went a whole day without thinking about them! then a week, then a month. it can be done! u just have to practice, its so important to not be consumed by your heartbreak! be stronger than that, even though something tells u u dont want to be or u cant or u wont. Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 2, 2011 Author Share Posted November 2, 2011 ahhh its an obsession... she didnt answer so i sent a 4page text... saying its a huge mess. GOD why am i doing this.... i just wana fix it but i know its probably making it worse... im not telling her i want her back or anything just want peace tween us etc.... AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FEEL IM GOING MAD Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 2, 2011 Author Share Posted November 2, 2011 easier said than done but im listening and will give it best. my situation is extra difficult cause gota stay in contact becasuse of kids. sigh tough day Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 2, 2011 Author Share Posted November 2, 2011 easier said than done but im listening and will give it best. my situation is extra difficult cause gota stay in contact becasuse of kids. sigh tough day Link to comment
Thorshammer Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 I had a dream about her last night, really pee'd me off. She walked into the room naked, doing her signature walk when she walked around naked. She said she was going back to her home-city, and i looked at her and said, "ok, so?" Then she said, "thats all i wanted, but i still want to be with you." Then I was going to stand the F up and put my foot so down that the earth will be like, "AYE, * * * IS WRONG WITH YOU, RELAX!" I was getting ready for my speech, and then i woke up. It messed with me for a bit, so i just turned on the tv and fell asleep watching something. The power of these dreams will wane in time. I wanted to avoid sleep during the first few weeks of the break up. I notice when I am stressed an lonely the dreams come. Link to comment
AngelAmber Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 ah no dreams about the ex are the worst! iv also been having alot a dreams, not much sleep maybe u need to like say ur speech u had planned to her or someone, and get angry for a bit while u say it, then go do some boxing or gym? might help, i know when i talk about it to my best friends i feel better but i know for guys its a bit harder as their best friends arnt always the same as a girls best friends who u can say sutff like that to Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 3, 2011 Author Share Posted November 3, 2011 i cant stop crying. i went round to see her to try explain how i feel, she wouldnt even look at me. ive hit the wall and am thinking stupid thoughts of self harm. Link to comment
AngelAmber Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 deadroo, pls dont feel so sad! i know its really really hard! but it will get better i gaurentee it will, it just takes time- which is the part that sucks!!! i promise u, i was in a worse situation, the guy i was living with, for 4 years, left me and a few weeks later met this random girl, a month or two later and she was pregnant. i still had to live with him for 6 months after we broke up. it was excruciating. i had to meet her. then eventually he moved out and in with her. then a year later they got married. trust me there were many many days where i had those thoughts too. i know how bad it can be. but just hang in there ok. go and be with friends, strangers, anyone, just find ppl to be around to keep u company and take ur mind a little bit off of things, i know for u its horrible as u have kids involved, but just think what would they feel/ think if something bad happened to u? theyd be devestated i gaurentee u that. be strong i know u can do it. pls reply so we know ur ok, i know i dont know u but i care that ur ok Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 3, 2011 Author Share Posted November 3, 2011 angelamber- thank you. i totally lost it today and was so scary. ive come over to aus and know no one its such a * * * * ty situation. wish this site had IM. Link to comment
Thorshammer Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 ah no dreams about the ex are the worst! iv also been having alot a dreams, not much sleep maybe u need to like say ur speech u had planned to her or someone, and get angry for a bit while u say it, then go do some boxing or gym? might help, i know when i talk about it to my best friends i feel better but i know for guys its a bit harder as their best friends arnt always the same as a girls best friends who u can say sutff like that to oooo, the speech was to... "F the F off...". Then to tell her to enjoy the long chase, and to make sure to get a long glass of water when she gets tired, oooh, and to get behind the ex with the big Jennifer Lopez butt, and not to get close to her, she might cut the Ssssh out of her (shes kind of gangsta). To take someone back just that easy will solve nothing, and I knew that, mind you this was a lucid dream, I thought this was reality. This would play out in reality, but then again... who knows. And yeah, i dont go to my guy friends. They do try to cheer me up when they reminded me of the crazy confident me before my ex. I go to my female friends, they love me because I was always there for them when they needed me, but there is so much you can rely on people before you become a burden. And I go to a kickboxing gym and take it out on whoever thinks they can go toe to toe with me when i can, yikes! Link to comment
AngelAmber Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 ah roo, heavy days man! i know how aus is i lived there with my ex for 3 years, we also didnt know anyone at all! was so hard. no family either, i was on the central coast 1 hr from sydney. very small town. glad u ok roo, yea IM would be so much better! Link to comment
AngelAmber Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 oooo, the speech was to... "F the F off...". Then to tell her to enjoy the long chase, and to make sure to get a long glass of water when she gets tired, oooh, and to get behind the ex with the big Jennifer Lopez butt, and not to get close to her, she might cut the Ssssh out of her (shes kind of gangsta). nice! high five for a great speech haha well yea tell her! and also u can tell her ur friend from south africa will fly there to personally kick her dry little... ya. haha And yeah, i dont go to my guy friends. They do try to cheer me up when they reminded me of the crazy confident me before my ex. I go to my female friends, they love me because I was always there for them when they needed me, but there is so much you can rely on people before you become a burden. yea i guess so hey, but im pretty chilled i dont get tired of ppl so im always around if u wanna chat ey well now look who should have been a therapist, haha say what lol And I go to a kickboxing gym and take it out on whoever thinks they can go toe to toe with me when i can, yikes! haha would be so awesome to see that! thats a great way to let out ur frustrations! kick ass, literally haha Link to comment
deadroo Posted November 4, 2011 Author Share Posted November 4, 2011 do you wanna msn? be nice to talk to you more. my email is email removed add me if wanna. Link to comment
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