How long does dating last?

[red12]

Ok I have been recently seeing this girl for about a month and 2 weeks. She said she didnt want to start any thing serious until she gets done with volleyball cause right now shes got school and volleyball. And she does alot of other things also like volunteers for speical events ect. Well i have to wait until october till she makes up her mind. And I dont know if i should have said we can do that. Well I really like her and I hope shes the one but it's hard to we did something last friday together and it was for about 1 hour then her other guy friend was ther and followed her to her house which i was not invited. Do u think she likes me or is she just taking advantage of me right now?

[Superfly81]

I think you know the answer to your question.

 

Picture it. Girl and boy in movie, they meet, it clicks, they date, it goes great... girl decides not to decide and asks the boy to wait more than a month... doesn't add up does it?

 

She's playing with your hard. Let her know where the line in the sand is, one more push and she's out. And when you walk away, you don't come back so it's time for her to make up her mind.

[red12]

But see we almost talk every night she text messages me while she is in school and stuff does that help any.

[Shidoshi]

I think she may be toying with you somewhat, not to say she doesn't like you, but if she knows that you will be waiting around for her she may slowly lose the desire to be with you. She has the upper hand right now because she said she doesn't want a heavy relationship right now, and YOU will have to wait for her to make up her mind. From my experience, if you aren't getting what you want out of this you have to set some rules of your own, because if you don't you may end up getting your heart broken. I wouldn't pressure her if I were you, but you need to act in a way that shows her that your not just going to be a boyfriend of convenience.

[Scout]

She definitely has the upper hand, but you can't be mad at her for it because you basically gave it to her. That being said, we've all found ourselves in a similiar situation at one time or another, and it's not really that fun.

 

I don't like it that she went on a date with you, than took up with another guy at her house and didn't invite you. That's not right.

 

Are you sure you want this girl? Because I think you could be treated a lot better by someone else.

[red12]

I really like some of her qualties but then again im starting to see a pattern with my self i get pissed at her every weekend. Like right now im kinda pissed off cause we havent done nothing together since last friday. Well i know i prolly shouldnt be cause im starting to think less of her every weekend. But im was thinking to myself cause i think shes taking advantage of me more and more and i think she maybe starting to use me. Also we only talk on the phone at night then she always ends the conversation with im tired i wanna go to bed. Last night i asked her why she always does that she said to me she had to get up at 7am but sometimes this not even on a school or work night. One time she told me she didnt want to talk long cause she had to go to work at 330 pm and she didnt want to talk all night i was like wtf.

[Andy Scott]

I don't know if this is going to turn out like you hoped red.

 

Before you leave the situation, however, try something for me:

 

It's time for YOU to get the upper hand. For some strange reason, I see a pattern in women that tells me they like hard-to-get guys, and if you can do that for this girl, she may be more attracted to you. Continue talking with her on the phone, and text message, etc. But instead of her ending the conversation, I want you to try it. Chat for ten to twenty minutes, then tell her you've got other stuff to do. Other phrases to say (on phone or texting): 'I've gotta go, a friend's coming over...' (leaves her wondering if this friend just might be a girl...) 'I'm tired and I need to get some sleep' (throwing the phrase right back at her) 'I need to go put some pants on and throw myself on the couch for a nap' (the no pants thing...well you know, haha, and you're basically saying sleep sounds like a better idea than talking on the phone). Use any, or none of them to your preference, I'm just giving you some ideas to keep her coming for more. If she ends up letting it pass without any resistance, this should key you in on the fact that she's not interested in you.

 

 

Good luck with her, and if not, move on to someone who cares about the person you are, and treats you well.

 

 

Andy

[yogaroots]

"we teach people how to treat us"

[red12]

Well Monday I got her good cause for some reason at work cause we work together. She would not say nothing to me cause she always has something to say to me. So after she gets out a work she asked me if i was mad at her cause I got out of work early. So I said no well I text her again and said that I dont things are working out. She text me back ask why. I told her she spends more time with her friends than me and doesnt talk to me like she used to. Boy did she jump on that she called me and we talked about it and she explained that she doesnt have much time due to volleyball, homework, ect. That kinda got me thinking maybe she really does care about what is between us. Also tonight after i get off work she told me to call her which she never did say that before some hopely things work out cause this girl is amazing to me.

[Shidoshi]

Hehe, glad to see things swinging in your direction, but remember not to get lazy about it because you will be back to square one, if not worse. I'm not implying you manipulate her but keep her guessing from time-to-time.

[red12]

I try not to get lazy about it but i know what you mean. I just hope im more in her favor than any thing.