To give or not to give...

[aloneforever]

Don't give them to her, be strong. She dumped you remember? she can pay for herself. If she wants the tickets now she can buy them herself, one of the things boyfriends are supposed to do is buy things and she needs to remember that. Go to the prom by yourself, or stay at home and drink yourself blind.

[simulacra]

Do you really want to go to the prom regardless? Is the prom something that you would want to experience regardless of who you go with? If so, and if you think the two of you can be mature about it the entire evening (no jealousy issues) then ask her to go as a date (not boyfriend-girlfriend, but just a date). If she doesn't want to do that then you could either ask that female friend to go as friends or sell the ticket to your ex and go solo. Or, if the prom is not that big of a deal for you, just ask your ex if she wants to buy both tickets off you. But definitely if she is treating you like crap you shouldn't pay for her ticket.

[simulacra]

Going as a date would mean you go together, pick her up, arrive together, spend time together, leave together. Going as friends would mean going together (maybe meeting up) and spending time with each other a little but spending more time with everyone there and maybe leaving together. But if you won't have many friends going, the friends thing might not be a good idea since you'll be left alone most likely. I think you should just ask that female friend to go and hang out with your ex and her friends too as a group thing. (I still dont' feel you should be giving your ex the ticket for free.)

[dp]

was talking to a friend.. he told me I should go with her, make it a great night, remind her why she liked me... and then when shes calling me and wanting to hang out, I turn her down... sort of show myself to be the better person and make her feel sorry or something lol

 

Sounds like a good plan right about now...the funny thing is.. we never officially said "its over" or "i dont want to be in a relationship with you anymore".. she just told me she needed the space and that she didn't want to tell me this because she said it would "probably" require us to break up... BUT we never really broke up.. lol and when I told her that id just give her a ticket and she could go with her friends..shes like "NO!" and seemed like she wanted me to go with her.. but that may just be because i spent so much dough...

[aloneforever]

Like I said, be strong. If you give her the ticket if you do you'll regret it later, walk away with dignity and maybe she'll feel that she missed out on something that could have been great.

[dp]

thanks guys.. I appreciate the advice (just now noticing i put this in the wrong section lol)

 

I think im gonna sell her the ticket and comtemplate going myself... hate to waste that money but it may be easier than seeing her...

 

she called and said she didn't want to lose her "best friend" and still wanted to hang out (asked me to tomorrow)... but I turned her down and think I need to take a step back from everything as my friend put it and find myself...

[Huligan]

what about someone else ... is she exclusive?

[emmorey]

heya

 

I dunno if you've gone to the prom, and what happened, but I think whatever has happened so far that you should take you friend's advice and take a step back and be strong. I know it's soooo difficult, I've just been through it myself. But you cannot force someone to be with you. It will ruin your self-confidence and self-esteem if you continuously try to make her get back with you. You will feel a lot stronger and have lots more self-respect if you do not allow yourself to be walked all over. Do you really want to be with someone who uses you?

 

I don't really know the entire situation, but I don't think you should hang out with her right now, because you will probably feel like you wanna be together again, and then you may end up feeling even more rejected, or she may blow hot and cold and hurt you again.

 

There are so many decent girls out there who would not do this to you. It may not seem that way right now. But it sounds like she wants to 'have her cake and eat it' (British expression, do u know it?!). She wants the safety and security of knowing you want her, but to date around as well. If it would hurt you to see her with someone else, which it undoubtedly would at this early stage, then its probably best to have time apart, to contemplate what you both want, and to feel strong enough to be happy single, not to require someone to make you feel whole. I jumped from relationship to relationship and now I've decied, painful as it is at first, to be single for a while, to find myself and be strong. The pain eases with time, and you'll end up realising the relationship wasn't perfect, and in fact you may be better off anyway.

 

I hope you work it out.

 

 

 

em