do you ever just snap with rage

[Borashi]

Sometimes things can set me off to the point where I'll just explode, first I'll be angry, then I might start crying and once I start I can't seem to stop. I then get real quiet, and remain on edge. Like today I was getting back from driving my route, I was headed to my work headquarters, I bumped into a friend whom works with me. He said one little negative comment to me and I just blew up, I felt like I could feel no pain and if I didn't hit the walls like I did, I feel like I would have shattered his face, for a while I just felt like I wanted to knock everybody out. I guess my question is once you snap like that can you contain your anger or get back in control? For instance once I explode, I then stay sad its like my mind gets caught up in the anger and then at times I feel like I can't stop crying even though I'm already over the issue that I was angry with.

[Scott M.]

Well i am almost never angry like that... i think you should get an anger ball. its a squishy ball that you squeeze when your mad. or when your angry go to the gym and work out or something like that.

[Mar]

I'd suggest something a bit more reliable.......anger management classes in your area. Sounds like a load of bull, I know, but I have a friend that's very similar to you, and he HAD to take those classes. And of course, before he took them, it was all, "Oh, this is bull......, why the *beep" should I take this, etc." Er.......because you don't have much wallspace left to punch, my friend....

 

He took the classes and they really did teach him effective ways of dealing with that explosive anger. I can't tell you what the techniques were, because he never told me, but he's a heck of a lot calmer now and you can actually see him THINK before he flies off the handle, which is a new experience for all of us!

 

But until you can do that, I'd suggest the simple things: taking a walk AWAY from the person/thing you're ready to hit, concentrating on your breathing and keeping it steady, counting from 1 to whatever makes you calm, doing arithmetic in your head for a sec, whatever is a distraction from the thing that made you angry. But most importantly, WALK AWAY. Don't jeapardize your job/family, etc., because you know you have this problem and couldn't control it over something insignificant. And truly, look into those classes, I'd swear by them.

 

Mar

[HSBoy44]

I know what you mean. Almost always I am a nice kind guy but sometimes all the things just add up and I just explode on people. It isnt usually big things that make me snap its just a collection of small things that happen. Whether it be people who irritate me, then something else, and then someone just does something small that I just hate. I dont do it a lot but when I do I usually give people their moneys worth, lol. I just cant control myself. But sometimes I try to avoid it by just saying what I want to say outloud in my head for a second and just hold it in and tell it to someone later on that you arent angry at. At one time I may just want to snap on someone Ill just try to hold it in and maybe an hour or so later just talk to someone you arent mad at and tell them what you wanted to say or what you were thinking. That way I get it off my chest and its not held in. Thats what I do.

[brokenpogostick]

i agree with Mar, i definitely think you need someone to talk to about this...if not a therapist or whatever, someone you trust, someone that will actually listen to your thoughts & feelings & try to help you cope. it doesn't seem healthy for you to do that to yourself...do you get headaches or whatever too?

[Borashi]

No I dont get headaches or anything like that, that instance that happened yesterday is a rarity for me, I'm a pretty calm nice person otherwise, thats the first time thats happened since last summer when I just blew up at a party. Doesn't everyone lose it occasionally?

Thanks

[PunkPyro912]

I know exactly what your talking about, i even have a post about it where i got some good advice. Im usually a nice guy just like you said but for me its the little things that build up on me and then i just let it all out at ones and i flip out at someone. I either scream into a pillow until my throat it raw or osmething and i start punching the walls or something. I know it seems bad but ive been trying really hard lately to keep my anger level down a bit but its just really hard for me. Your not alone wth your anger problem and if i were you i would prolly get some relaxation classes or something. I probably will when i get older and i hope it all works out for you. 8)

[Archer]

Yep, sometimes I would snap like that when I was younger but I started looking at it this way.

 

One broken hand three weeks to heal.

One hole in wall 200.00 dollars to fix.

Problems solved zero.

 

It has helped, I haven't snapped like that in years.

If I feel angry I go for a walk or if it is at work I take a break finding a nice quiet place to gather my thoughts or call my wife and just talk.

 

I hope this helps.

[SickOfAnger]

I've been considering anger management classes myself. I yell and curse when I'm upset...Almost without me realizing it until I am totally flipping out...

 

I'm a nice girl... and there's alot more to it .....

 

Can someone tell me how I go about making my own post?

[mohd]

Borashi, i can really relate to you.. i don't know how i can control my anger so well now.. i'd recommend a start with the stress ball. Then see if you need additional help

 

To sick of anger:

Click back and press on "new topic" (or something that sounds like that)