What should I do about this guy?

[cranberry]

Hello,

 

There is this guy at my work that I think likes me. For instance, we work in different departments but he always trys to talk to me at break, and he says hi when I walk by, plus the whole staring thing too, etc. The only thing is I'm not sure how I feel about him. I just can't make up my mind. He's a year younger than me, and a bit shorter than me and that as shallow as it sounds kinda turns me off a little bit. I guess I feel older than him--I just graduated from highschool (and will be going to U. in Sept.) and he just finished gr.11. He's good looking yet he's a little goofy but he has the nicest smile, which automatically somehow makes me smile back at him. After I've talked to him I find myself still smiling when I return to my department.

When I talk to him face to face, I think he doesn't look too young but at other times he looks 16. And I still find myself more attracted to the older and more mature looking guys 19+.

 

And there is another thing. I wrote awhile back about this other guy at my work that I liked. Well I still kind of like him and see him sometimes (just walking by) but I haven't talked to him at all for a few months (since our convo in the breakroom). When I walk by him sometimes he won't even notice me yet at other times he'll kinda look my way.

 

Help please. I don't know what to do.

Thanks.

[JonnyG]

I don't think any of us can really help u. It sounds cliche, but do what your heart wants. We cant tell u who to go out with, its upto u. Dont let the fact that the guy is 1 year younger than u put u off. Its kind of amusing but at school i remembered that u couldn't b friends with people younger than u, or go out with someone older than u (meaning guy go out with older year girl). Well, this is pretty much the norm in school. Yet when u go to uni, age seems to not effect your decisions. For a start the course u go on will have a mixture of people at all different ages. I have friends a year younger than me, and friends 3 years older than me. This doesnt happen in school, or rarely happens. Every girl i have gone out with and every girl i have pulled at uni has basically been older than me. Again, this is very rare at school. In fact my ex is 8 and a half years older than me. And this girl i am seeing at the moment (just a sexual relationship) is 4 years older than me. Im 22. My point is that age doesnt really matter, u will notice this when u get older.

 

As for the other guy. I think i remember reading your post about it. Not sure if he is interested. It sounded like he was, or maybe he was just being very friendly? But now it would appear that either a) he doesnt think u are interested in him and so has given up, or b) he has found someone else and thereforeeee not encouraging u. Like i said, he may not be interested at all, just wanted to be friends?

 

Give the younger guy a chance i would say. Just go off on the odd date and see how u find him. U don't have to out with him for good.

[sarahmaria]

hey,

i've been in a very similar situation... a younger guy had a crush on me and actually asked me out... i said no..

its difficult to admit that the age difference is a problem with you, but we have to face it, not only is he younger but he's in grade 11 while you are going to university... this would make it harder as you will always be on different levels of thinking... while he's thinking of graduating highschool, you'll be focusing on handing in an assignment or something.. you'll be living two very different lives... highschool and university are two very different environments...

he hasnt asked you out yet, so relax... if he does, try to think about what you really think about the age difference, then give him a straight answer..

anyways alot of boys have crushes on older girls... i remember how my brother had all sorts of crushes on my friends, but he didn't do anything about them... it maybe a phase that he's going through...

as for the other guy am not so sure about what the breakroom thing was so i really can't give any advice on that... sorry.

tc sarah

[cranberry]

Hey JonnyG, I think your right about the other guy. I think he did like me but has given up since we didn't see each other for a few months. But I don't know what to do about that. I guess I'm just waiting until we each have break at the same time (if we ever do), and if the feeling is right strike up a convo. However, I'm kind of giving up hope on him...I think it would be best if I did because nothing has happened for a few months.

Now for the younger guy, say if we did go out I would want it to be just for fun not as a date. But wouldn't it be unfair for me to do so because I don't want to lead him on? (Also I think like you said that age differences won't matter once I'm in university (or older) because at least everyone is in the same scenario/path despite the different age ranges.)

 

Then again like Maria said, he hasn't actually asked me out yet so I should relax, lol. Yet I think I'm more to what Maria said--he's still in highschool while I'm off to university...we're just on two different paths..and that is always going to be etched in my mind. If you want to hear...well, read...my other story about the other guy, it's easy to search for just type in my user name and all my posts will show up...I only have a few, I think the ones about this guy were, "I haven't talked to him in a while" and "Help me with my guy dilemma".

 

Thanks you guys for taking the time to give me adivice, it really helped me to start sorting out my thoughts.