SpottiOtti Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 I was wondering if anyone could give me some advice on how to handle the fear of engulfment. I have been dating a man for about three months now and our feelings for each other have gotten quite strong. However, I have noticed that if we have a period in which we are bonding particularly well and really connecting, I pull away afterwards. For example, we spent this past weekend together, and last night in particular I felt very connected and loving toward him. But then it was too much and I began to feel smothered. I felt the depth of his feelings for me and it annoyed me. This morning I couldn’t wait to get away from him. I’m very confused. I don’t understand myself; how I could love him deeply then resent him for loving me back just as deeply? I believe that what I am experiencing is a fear of engulfment. I felt that I recognized the symptoms, remembered them from my previous relationship. The feeling would sound, if put into words, something vaguely like this: What do you want from me exactly? What if I can’t give it to you? Has anyone had any success with this issue? Link to comment
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