Klimtz Posted May 1, 2010 Share Posted May 1, 2010 I will meet with my ex in a week. Coffe or whatever... my story: So, any suggestions, what to look for, how to handle this? Thank you. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted May 1, 2010 Share Posted May 1, 2010 Sounds like it's still too hurtful a time to try to be friends. I wouldn't plan on trying that until you've moved on. Grief is natural, but continuing to scratch open your wounds by continuing contact won't help you to heal. Push yourself into your future and start living there first. Once the pain is part of your past, you can decide whether contact will only set you back, or whether you can attempt it from a stronger place. In your corner. Link to comment
Klimtz Posted May 1, 2010 Author Share Posted May 1, 2010 thank you my friend. At this point I really dont see the purpose of all of that coffe thing. Its like I am gong for the last nail in my coffin I hope you read my previous post. Part of me wants a definitive closure, part is out of control... Part of me knows that it will just be her telling me that...whatever... I (dont) wanna hear. Pretty sadistic? Ha? And one important selfish thing... I just wanna lay out everything down the table from my side (No: I love you things) - everything that was bothering me for a long time in my life (with or without her), but at this point I know that its pretty useless.. Why? Becouse she really doesnt care that much about it...Otherwise... And what do you mean with "attempting contact from a strong place..."? Anyway thank you... Watching your corner You are safe... And I`m in love Link to comment
catfeeder Posted May 1, 2010 Share Posted May 1, 2010 A strong place means a future state of mind when you can revisit fond memories without the pain you're feeling today. Frankly, I don't believe in the whole playing-frendzies thing with exes unless there are children involved. However, I also don't see it as my place to try to talk anyone who's determined out of their vision. All I can do is suggest avoiding contact unless and until you're in a strong place in your own life--you've moved on, you've rediscovered your own friendships, you're content with your work life, you've explored some new interests or hidden talents that bring some passion back into your life. Once you feel strong enough about your own life and your own future, you may not feel the same urge to connect with ex--you're already questioning the purpose and value of this pursuit. That's a good thing. My best, Cat Link to comment
Klimtz Posted May 1, 2010 Author Share Posted May 1, 2010 I understand.. I think I am gonna snowboard soon with my brother somewhere in gletscher in Austria on high altitude Focus on my dreams. Thats why I love him. One and only. Bro power Little things are sometimes such a big ones.. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted May 1, 2010 Share Posted May 1, 2010 Yes, so true. I can pour my heart out to friends, and people can be so kind, and they all mean well, and still nothing helps. Then my sister can say one small thing, and my world changes. EnjOy your trip. Link to comment
Klimtz Posted May 3, 2010 Author Share Posted May 3, 2010 But the fact really is that I inniciated that coffe thing... And realizing while listening to David Gray songs, that I really dont see the purpose of that. And I just dont wanna come weak in this eventual meeting. Should I just forget about it, or stay strong (try) and see where will it go? Link to comment
catfeeder Posted May 3, 2010 Share Posted May 3, 2010 But the fact really is that I inniciated that coffe thing... And realizing while listening to David Gray songs, that I really dont see the purpose of that. And I just dont wanna come weak in this eventual meeting. Should I just forget about it, or stay strong (try) and see where will it go? Nobody else can tell you what you should do. I can only tell you what I would do; I would cancel the coffee. Link to comment
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