new to cyber relationships

[blackdog280]

I meet a guy online and we clicked straight away, he wants to meet for coffee but I am a bit nervous. I want to have a relationship with him, how do I do that?

[mmike]

You know you want a relationship without even meeting?

 

I understand that you may be nervous, everyone has varying levels of nervousness when meeting someone for the first time but to let it prevent a meeting is counter productive because he will interpret it like you are not so interested in him and he may move on.

 

Talk on the phone, that shows him you are still interested and allows you to get to know him better and reduce your nervousness.

 

Personally, I think it is pointless to email more than a few times....the only way to know who you are dealing with and if both of you feel attraction for one another is to meet, period.

 

If anything, it is the safest way, because you can get an honest signal of who he is (through non-verbal communication) instead of smoke and mirrors over email.

 

Agree to meet at a busy coffee shop that is easy to get to, just meet him there. Limit it to 1/2 hour or an hour and if you liked him make sure you indicate to him you are interested in meeting again..so he does not think you cut it short due to lack of interest.

Just enjoy yourself..it is fun meeting new people.

[Speranza]

You can't decide to 'have a relationship' with anybody - 'how you do that' is meet a few times, get to that point.. you may meet and find there is no spark there at all.

 

Three really important things I learned about internet dating:

1) Always have at the back of your mind that someone may be creating a fantasy life online - they may be in a relationship, married, whatever. There is no way to know until you have been seeing them IRL for a while.

2) Surprisingly, you can have that spark online and it may be absent IRL - they may not even look the same. I have met several guys with high hopes and been shocked by how obviously wrong we were for each other the moment we met.

3) NEVER treat a first meeting as a date. I relaxed completely the day I began to say to guys, "Well - let's meet for coffee and see if we'd like to go on a date." It takes all the pressure off, and also reminds you NOT to have unrealistic expectations.

 

Have fun with your Internet dating, I stopped when I realised it had become more of a hobby with no relationships resulting, but I know people who've met and even married, so - remember it's a numbers game, don't go anywhere isolated, keep safe and enjoy meeting lots of people!

[newwave]

My same experience. I've found that most of the guys I met online either were married, liars, con artists, or just looking to date around and not interested in anything serious (usually with sex). A few were doing it to make their girlfriend jealous and had no intention of anything. That's why I quit doing it. A few were great guys, but meeting one great guy and 10 I don't want isn't good investment for me.

[Billy Ray]

My same experience. I've found that most of the guys I met online either were married, liars, con artists, or just looking to date around and not interested in anything serious (usually with sex). A few were doing it to make their girlfriend jealous and had no intention of anything. That's why I quit doing it. A few were great guys, but meeting one great guy and 10 I don't want isn't good investment for me.

 

What happened to the great guys you dated? Did you continue to go out with them?

[newwave]

What happened to the great guys you dated? Did you continue to go out with them?

 

No, because I realized that with most of them there wasn't enough to be anything. We were just too different. One guy I went out a little bit but it didn't work. A few became friends.

[Loriana]

How long have you actually been talking to this guy for?, i don't think you should rush into anything it all seems a bit sudden its like BAMN the sparks there lets meet. I think you should get to know the guy first what is the rush you know?. If you haven't already talk to him on the phone so you can hear his voice it'll put your mind at ease and might make you feel less nervous.